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Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Kali Parsons

Title of Art: Hope

Artist’s Website: kaliparsons.com

Instagram: @kaliparsonsart

 

If you connected with this story in any way Michael & Susan would love to hear from you. They can be reached via e-mail at michaeldbreazeale@gmail.com

 

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

Hey there my artsy fartsy, nerdy wordy friends. Sorrynotsorry, you know if you’re here you’re at least half of that description, if not the whole shebang! Own it already.

 

I would venture to accuse today’s artist of being both artsy fartsy AND nerdy wordy. Because Kali Parsons has been on my list of artists to feature here since day one of brainstorming Art Ink, well before even a second of audio was recorded. She was one of the few artists I followed who always wrote a tiny story to share along with her fun and whimsical art, and so if you’re an artist who wants to see great examples of how a splash of story can be used to compliment your art, I insist you check out her work at kaliparsons.com.

 

If you’re new to Art Ink, you should know that it’s Kali’s painting that’s gracing the cover of this episode. And it’s that very painting that inspired the beautiful story you’re about to hear. This is usually the part where I describe the featured artwork for listeners who are unable to look at their devices for whatever reason, but today we’re going to be doing things a bit differently. As Kali wrote to me, “Sometimes the art takes off and creates a story all on its own.” And this painting, named “Hope,” isn’t just the spark that instigated this episode, she’s also a character in the following true story.

 

 

I present to you The Synchronicity of Hope.

 

 

[Story:]

 

 

“Hope is the power of being cheerful in circumstances that we know to be desperate.” -GK Chesterton

 

Most 18-year-old kids get a tattoo to rebel against their parents, but not Sean. No, Sean’s 1st tattoo was an orange and purple, single-word prayer that his mom would survive what life had dealt her, and his dad not only went with him, but got his own, matching ink, the very same day.

 

“Hope,” the tattoos said. And that’s what Sean and his father, Michael, did. They hoped that Susan could beat the cancer she’d just been diagnosed with. Hodgkin’s Lymphoma was the 2nd critical diagnosis Susan had taken since becoming a wife and a mother, after a 17-year struggle with primary progressive MS, which is a type of MS that doesn’t remit or relapse. It came on fast and it’s progressively gotten worse over the years. Sean had only been a few months old when that news had come; he doesn’t remember the version of his mother who wasn’t reliant on a wheelchair.

 

Hope had already been a familiar mantra for their family for several years, had become one after they’d attended their first MS Awareness walk together. Susan’s first neurologist was convinced a cure for MS would be developed in our lifetimes, and that was the hope that she had clung to all those years… so you can imagine the devastation when yet another layer of health challenges began to manifest.

 

This new diagnosis was the catalyst for Sean and Michael to literally inject a healthy dose of hope into their skin. They chose orange ink to stand for MS Awareness; and the purple ink represented Hodgkin’s.

 

Shortly afterwards, their mantra started to expand into a wall in their home that was dedicated to hope-filled art and design.

 

Meanwhile… Michael’s childhood friend, Kali, had been following his updates on Facebook. They hadn’t been in touch through more than social media since their 7th grade band broke up, yet Kali was continuously moved by the strength she witnessed in Michael and Susan’s marriage. When the post that detailed this latest blow to their family’s struggle went live, Kali had just finished a painting that would be a perfect fit for them, and it just so happened to be called “Hope.” It was of a serene looking girl outlined in black with her eyes closed, and the word “hope” in one, thin, black line of script hovered above her head, the only pop of color on the black and white canvas was a blue heart that filled the girl’s entire chest.

 

So Kali had a print made and sent it to Michael. Soon afterwards, much too soon afterwards Kali recalled, she’d gotten a notification that the original painting had sold on her website, and it was Michael who had bought it! There was no way the print had had enough time to make it through the mail, but Kali couldn’t be sure until she asked him.

 

“Hey, my friend.” Kali sent to Michael via Facebook. “I just have to ask. Received a surprise package I sent you? Just curious if we have some synchronicity going. xo”

 

“No. When did you send it? Was it USPS? If you sent me a print of “Hope” that would be some kind of next level awesomeness going on. Did you?”

 

“That’s exactly what it was! I didn’t think it could’ve gotten to you yet. I love you and me!”

 

“Hang on a moment. I gotta bring Susan up to speed on this…. We are both a little teary-eyed right now. I saw that a few other people had shown interest and then I got pretty busy with work. But just like you, she’s been in my mind all this time. When I saw her again this morning, I didn’t think twice about placing the order. Susan said to tell you ‘thank you.’ So much love for you and so inspired by your beautiful soul.”

 

So I have to ask you, dear listeners… do you think it might be possible for art to be aware. That just maybe Kali’s painting had it’s own mission to fulfill… that’s it’s possible for “things” to have souls? That they have a kind of consciousness that sends subtle energies into the Universe? Am I losing you with my weirdoism? Well… then let’s get back to the story shall we?

 

Because “Hope,” the painting, made her way into Michael’s home, but though she served as a constant source of inspiration for him and his family, she was more therapy than cure.

 

The challenges are real and seemingly never ending, and though Michael knows his marriage is stronger than it’s ever been, he still misses the good old days, before MS, before cancer. When I asked him in an email what their biggest struggle was he replied openly and vulnerably:

 

“Our biggest struggle. Wow.” He wrote. “Strap in because this is a deep sharing. Physical love & intimacy. Susan was 26 when she was diagnosed and I was 29. Married for three years, new beautiful baby son, young & in love and totally hot for each other. Within two years, spasticity had completely changed her body geometry and bladder incontinence had forced us to get a urostomy.

 

Chemotherapies we tried to slow down the MS had led to early menopause and muscle contractures & spasticity has caused her arms to cross and they are now locked to her chest. None of this is very sexy or romantic. It’s been over a decade that Susan hasn’t been able to hug me or hold me.

 

I tell people that love is like a wheel with many spokes. Physical, sex, intimacy, companionship, friendship, community, happiness, joy, spirituality, mental, dialog, honesty, trust, confidence and action; to name a few. True love can handle the removal of several of these spokes and the wheel will continue to roll and do its job. It’s false love that falls apart when you remove just one or a few.

But, it’s been difficult to not have the physical aspect of our love and it’s a deep source of depression for me.”

 

But, alongside Michael and Susan’s greatest struggle, lies some of their most precious memories. The two that they shared with me in that same email, interestingly enough, also came about on the other side of cancer.

 

“We had limited options in treating her cancer.” Michael explained. “No radiation therapy and only two of the four drugs on the second choice for chemotherapies. Susan did initially respond well to the chemo, but then it stalled. We switched to immunotherapy which actually put her into remission. But, the lymph nodes became active again within six months. This was grim. We had the conversation about how long we might be able to keep the cancer from ending her life and “salvage” therapies. They really need to come up with a better term than that.

 

A few months later we were at the opening night of the Orange County Fair. It’s a tradition for us to go to the opening night and to share a funnel cake just before we leave. We were sharing our desert and Susan asked me what I thought about renewing our vows on our anniversary. I pondered this for a moment and asked her, “Did you just propose to me over funnel cake at a county fair?” Which I joked was the most white trash thing I could think of. Then of course tearfully, I said yes. That part is my fondest memory of our love story. Susan’s is the actual vow renewal…”

 

[Vow Renewal Ceremony]

 

“Dearest family and friends, we are here today to celebrate the story of two hearts named Michael and Susan. Let me tell you how the story goes.

 

Once upon a time, a dedicated young Marine walked into a hotel lobby where a spirited young lady worked behind the counter. Through the trickery of his cohorts, the young Marine soon found himself riding beside the young lady in a snazzy white convertible. The young Marine did not realize he was about to be taken on the ride of a lifetime! Neither realized they had just met their soulmate.

 

As these two beautiful hearts became entwined, a promise to love and cherish forever was the natural next step. They were married September 25th 1993. Twenty-two years ago yesterday. That year, a gallon of gas cost $1.11 and a movie ticket was $4.14. It was the year Beanie Babies were introduced. And let’s not forget Milli Vanilli returned their Grammy. Girl, you know it’s true!

 

Soon after and with plenty of K-I-S-S-I-N-G, the two hearts became further and inextricably entwined. Much like two trees planted next to each other decades ago.

 

Rings are often exchanged at weddings as a symbol of eternal love. Love is the state in which your partner’s happiness comes above all else. The circle of the ring represents wholeness and perfection, with no beginning and no end. It wraps the finger of the loved one with the constant reminder of love, devotion, and respect. So today, I wrap these two hearts in the circle of this sash which represents their joint, steadfast recommitment to the ties which bind them together.

 

Michael and Susan, today, with the love and support of your friends and family, you honor each other as beloveds and partners in marriage.

 

Michael, would you please share your thoughts and promises with Susan?

 

[Michael’s Vows]

 

‘My dearest Susan, as we are here together today, I think back to all the wonderful memories we have shared. There really is no greater feeling than to have your best friend by your side every day. Twenty-two years ago, I promised to love you, no matter what else happened. And though we have had our struggles, that love has been strong enough to persevere through them all.

 

You have been confident, caring, nurturing, optimistic and supportive; even when the bounds of sickness and health have been tested to their limits. You are my best friend and lover, my partner, my shoulder to cry on and the arms that I cannot imagine being without. I have always loved you. I still love you. I love you as much now as I did twenty-two years ago. And I know that at some time in the future, when we meet again, on beach in the warm sun, destined to be together, that I will love you then.

 

Today I pledge to be by your side, to be your strength when you are weak, to never leave you, to be understanding and to be the husband you deserve. I love you.’

 

Susan, would you please share your thoughts and promises with Michael?

 

[Susan’s Vows]

 

‘Michael,

 

I’ve had a difficult time trying to find the perfect words to tell you just how much you mean to me and how much love I have for you. None the less I’m going to try…

 

The night we met, I asked who wanted to ride with me and your hand went up and you said I will. I had no idea that we would still be on that ride 23 years later and that hand would hold mine as we made our way through all that life had in store for us.

 

For better or worse, in sickness and health, for richer or poorer. We have been tested by all the original vows we made. Together we have, not only survived, but triumphed.

 

Michael, you are my strength. Not only physically but more importantly, emotionally. You make me laugh. You drive me crazy. You frustrate me. You make me proud. And you make me love you more every day.

 

Today, I am reaffirming my commitment to you and our life together. I promise to be your friend and confidante, your sounding board, and your safe place. I will continue to look towards our future with optimism and excitement.

 

I love you, Michael.’

 

 

As you continue on your journey together, I encourage you to remember that as tides ebb and flow, so too do the fortunes of life. Footprints in the sand are washed away. Driftwood moves on its endless quest for a peaceful harbor. Only a deep and abiding love can withstand the tides of change in two lives.

 

May you continue to be sensitive to each other’s needs. Be open and understanding with each other. Share your thoughts and feelings out loud in the safe harbor of your relationship. Continue to bring out the best in other.

 

By the power invested in me, I now pronounce you Spaghetti and Meatballs! Michael, you may kiss your bride.

 

Friends, family, I now present to you, for the first time ever, Mr. and Mrs. Breazeale version 2.0!”

 

And yes, in case you’re wondering, their officiant was ordained by the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and she did that specifically for this occasion. It made sense considering the Breazeale’s aren’t unified in their religious beliefs.

 

“Our family is kind of like a joke.” Michael wrote in another email. “You know, “an Agnostic, a Buddhist and a Christian walk into a bar.” He was writing to answer my final question to him about what Hope means to them. And, just like a prayer, the definition of Hope is shaped by its beholder.

 

“I like what Desmond Tutu has to say about Hope. ‘I’m not an optimist because that in a sense is something that depends on feeling. More than the actual reality. We feel optimistic, or we feel pessimistic. Now hope is different, in that it is based not on the ephemarality of feelings. But on the firm ground of conviction. I believe with a steadfast faith that there can never be a situation that is utterly, totally hopeless. Hope is deeper and very close to unshakeable. It’s in the pit of your tummy.’

 

We both agree that Hope is a dynamic feeling and that it changes over time.

 

For Susan, initially that Hope was mostly defined around her MS. Her first neurologist told her that within his career “…there would be a cure for MS.” Three neurologists later there still isn’t a cure. But in the words of Archbishop Tutu she believes with a steadfast faith that her situation is not totally hopeless. When she was diagnosed with lymphoma, that Hope changed to something maybe a little more desperate. The Hope that the cancer could be cured and not end her life. The Hope that Sean and I would be able to cope with losing her, if that were to happen. The last 1.5 years have been a test for me. Anxiety and depression led me down a path of alcohol addiction. I’m in recovery and we are strong. But, some of those Hopes are now about being successful in recovery and continuing to experience joy in our lives.

 

My Hopes mirror my Buddhist philosophy. I constantly meditate about being able to choose the right paths, to help reduce her suffering to as little as possible. To choose the paths that will give her love and joy. I’m definitely a believer in reincarnation. I know with that same steadfast Hope that in the future, Susan and I will meet again. Somewhere on a beach, in the warm sun and we will know that we will have both found something special. That Hope and her Love gives me strength to continue living our love story.”

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

When Kali wrote to me about the synchronicity she’d experienced with “Hope” she concluded her email with some credits, “I thank my art, I thank our open spirits, I thank [Michael’s] beautiful wife [Susan], and I must thank Facebook … through these four a space was created in the Universe for our friendship to bloom and magic to happen.”

 

And we also would like to thank Michael and Susan for being so open to sharing their personal journey with us today. Your story has both humbled and inspired us. Last but not least, we thank Kali, for sharing her beautiful work with us here and, of course, for connecting all the dots that led to this show.

 

Be sure to visit Kali at kaliparsons.com and @kaliparsonsart on Instagram. Links to those places can be found in the show notes, along with a photo of the painting that inspired today’s episode. Sadly, not all podcast apps show the featured artwork the same way, but there’s always a link to where you can see the art included in those show notes.

 

You’ll also be able to find additional photos Michael sent me in the show notes, including the ‘Hope’ wall, so be sure to dig into that too, when you’re able.

 

If you connected with this story in any way Michael & Susan would love to hear from you. They can be reached via e-mail at michaeldbreazeale@gmail.com

 

That’s all we have for you today, thank you all so much for listening. Check back in couple of weeks and you’ll be able to hear me later. TTFN my friends.

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