Art Ink – 17 – The Synchronicity of Hope

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Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Kali Parsons

Title of Art: Hope

Artist’s Website: kaliparsons.com

Instagram: @kaliparsonsart

 

If you connected with this story in any way Michael & Susan would love to hear from you. They can be reached via e-mail at michaeldbreazeale@gmail.com

 

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

Hey there my artsy fartsy, nerdy wordy friends. Sorrynotsorry, you know if you’re here you’re at least half of that description, if not the whole shebang! Own it already.

 

I would venture to accuse today’s artist of being both artsy fartsy AND nerdy wordy. Because Kali Parsons has been on my list of artists to feature here since day one of brainstorming Art Ink, well before even a second of audio was recorded. She was one of the few artists I followed who always wrote a tiny story to share along with her fun and whimsical art, and so if you’re an artist who wants to see great examples of how a splash of story can be used to compliment your art, I insist you check out her work at kaliparsons.com.

 

If you’re new to Art Ink, you should know that it’s Kali’s painting that’s gracing the cover of this episode. And it’s that very painting that inspired the beautiful story you’re about to hear. This is usually the part where I describe the featured artwork for listeners who are unable to look at their devices for whatever reason, but today we’re going to be doing things a bit differently. As Kali wrote to me, “Sometimes the art takes off and creates a story all on its own.” And this painting, named “Hope,” isn’t just the spark that instigated this episode, she’s also a character in the following true story.

 

 

I present to you The Synchronicity of Hope.

 

 

[Story:]

 

Susan & Michael on their Wedding Day in 1993

 

“Hope is the power of being cheerful in circumstances that we know to be desperate.” -GK Chesterton

 

Most 18-year-old kids get a tattoo to rebel against their parents, but not Sean. No, Sean’s 1st tattoo was an orange and purple, single-word prayer that his mom would survive what life had dealt her, and his dad not only went with him, but got his own, matching ink, the very same day.

 

“Hope,” the tattoos said. And that’s what Sean and his father, Michael, did. They hoped that Susan could beat the cancer she’d just been diagnosed with. Hodgkin’s Lymphoma was the 2nd critical diagnosis Susan had taken since becoming a wife and a mother, after a 17-year struggle with primary progressive MS, which is a type of MS that doesn’t remit or relapse. It came on fast and it’s progressively gotten worse over the years. Sean had only been a few months old when that news had come; he doesn’t remember the version of his mother who wasn’t reliant on a wheelchair.

 

Hope had already been a familiar mantra for their family for several years, had become one after they’d attended their first MS Awareness walk together. Susan’s first neurologist was convinced a cure for MS would be developed in our lifetimes, and that was the hope that she had clung to all those years… so you can imagine the devastation when yet another layer of health challenges began to manifest.

 

Susan

This new diagnosis was the catalyst for Sean and Michael to literally inject a healthy dose of hope into their skin. They chose orange ink to stand for MS Awareness; and the purple ink represented Hodgkin’s.

 

Shortly afterwards, their mantra started to expand into a wall in their home that was dedicated to hope-filled art and design.

 

Meanwhile… Michael’s childhood friend, Kali, had been following his updates on Facebook. They hadn’t been in touch through more than social media since their 7th grade band broke up, yet Kali was continuously moved by the strength she witnessed in Michael and Susan’s marriage. When the post that detailed this latest blow to their family’s struggle went live, Kali had just finished a painting that would be a perfect fit for them, and it just so happened to be called “Hope.” It was of a serene looking girl outlined in black with her eyes closed, and the word “hope” in one, thin, black line of script hovered above her head, the only pop of color on the black and white canvas was a blue heart that filled the girl’s entire chest.

 

So Kali had a print made and sent it to Michael. Soon afterwards, much too soon afterwards Kali recalled, she’d gotten a notification that the original painting had sold on her website, and it was Michael who had bought it! There was no way the print had had enough time to make it through the mail, but Kali couldn’t be sure until she asked him.

 

“Hey, my friend.” Kali sent to Michael via Facebook. “I just have to ask. Received a surprise package I sent you? Just curious if we have some synchronicity going. xo”

 

“No. When did you send it? Was it USPS? If you sent me a print of “Hope” that would be some kind of next level awesomeness going on. Did you?”

 

“That’s exactly what it was! I didn’t think it could’ve gotten to you yet. I love you and me!”

 

“Hang on a moment. I gotta bring Susan up to speed on this…. We are both a little teary-eyed right now. I saw that a few other people had shown interest and then I got pretty busy with work. But just like you, she’s been in my mind all this time. When I saw her again this morning, I didn’t think twice about placing the order. Susan said to tell you ‘thank you.’ So much love for you and so inspired by your beautiful soul.”

 

So I have to ask you, dear listeners… do you think it might be possible for art to be aware. That just maybe Kali’s painting had it’s own mission to fulfill… that’s it’s possible for “things” to have souls? That they have a kind of consciousness that sends subtle energies into the Universe? Am I losing you with my weirdoism? Well… then let’s get back to the story shall we?

 

Because “Hope,” the painting, made her way into Michael’s home, but though she served as a constant source of inspiration for him and his family, she was more therapy than cure.

 

The Hope Wall

The challenges are real and seemingly never ending, and though Michael knows his marriage is stronger than it’s ever been, he still misses the good old days, before MS, before cancer. When I asked him in an email what their biggest struggle was he replied openly and vulnerably:

 

“Our biggest struggle. Wow.” He wrote. “Strap in because this is a deep sharing. Physical love & intimacy. Susan was 26 when she was diagnosed and I was 29. Married for three years, new beautiful baby son, young & in love and totally hot for each other. Within two years, spasticity had completely changed her body geometry and bladder incontinence had forced us to get a urostomy.

 

Chemotherapies we tried to slow down the MS had led to early menopause and muscle contractures & spasticity has caused her arms to cross and they are now locked to her chest. None of this is very sexy or romantic. It’s been over a decade that Susan hasn’t been able to hug me or hold me.

 

I tell people that love is like a wheel with many spokes. Physical, sex, intimacy, companionship, friendship, community, happiness, joy, spirituality, mental, dialog, honesty, trust, confidence and action; to name a few. True love can handle the removal of several of these spokes and the wheel will continue to roll and do its job. It’s false love that falls apart when you remove just one or a few.

But, it’s been difficult to not have the physical aspect of our love and it’s a deep source of depression for me.”

 

But, alongside Michael and Susan’s greatest struggle, lies some of their most precious memories. The two that they shared with me in that same email, interestingly enough, also came about on the other side of cancer.

 

“We had limited options in treating her cancer.” Michael explained. “No radiation therapy and only two of the four drugs on the second choice for chemotherapies. Susan did initially respond well to the chemo, but then it stalled. We switched to immunotherapy which actually put her into remission. But, the lymph nodes became active again within six months. This was grim. We had the conversation about how long we might be able to keep the cancer from ending her life and “salvage” therapies. They really need to come up with a better term than that.

 

A few months later we were at the opening night of the Orange County Fair. It’s a tradition for us to go to the opening night and to share a funnel cake just before we leave. We were sharing our desert and Susan asked me what I thought about renewing our vows on our anniversary. I pondered this for a moment and asked her, “Did you just propose to me over funnel cake at a county fair?” Which I joked was the most white trash thing I could think of. Then of course tearfully, I said yes. That part is my fondest memory of our love story. Susan’s is the actual vow renewal…”

 

[Vow Renewal Ceremony]

 

“Dearest family and friends, we are here today to celebrate the story of two hearts named Michael and Susan. Let me tell you how the story goes.

 

Once upon a time, a dedicated young Marine walked into a hotel lobby where a spirited young lady worked behind the counter. Through the trickery of his cohorts, the young Marine soon found himself riding beside the young lady in a snazzy white convertible. The young Marine did not realize he was about to be taken on the ride of a lifetime! Neither realized they had just met their soulmate.

 

As these two beautiful hearts became entwined, a promise to love and cherish forever was the natural next step. They were married September 25th 1993. Twenty-two years ago yesterday. That year, a gallon of gas cost $1.11 and a movie ticket was $4.14. It was the year Beanie Babies were introduced. And let’s not forget Milli Vanilli returned their Grammy. Girl, you know it’s true!

 

Soon after and with plenty of K-I-S-S-I-N-G, the two hearts became further and inextricably entwined. Much like two trees planted next to each other decades ago.

 

Rings are often exchanged at weddings as a symbol of eternal love. Love is the state in which your partner’s happiness comes above all else. The circle of the ring represents wholeness and perfection, with no beginning and no end. It wraps the finger of the loved one with the constant reminder of love, devotion, and respect. So today, I wrap these two hearts in the circle of this sash which represents their joint, steadfast recommitment to the ties which bind them together.

 

Michael and Susan, today, with the love and support of your friends and family, you honor each other as beloveds and partners in marriage.

 

Michael, would you please share your thoughts and promises with Susan?

 

[Michael’s Vows]

 

‘My dearest Susan, as we are here together today, I think back to all the wonderful memories we have shared. There really is no greater feeling than to have your best friend by your side every day. Twenty-two years ago, I promised to love you, no matter what else happened. And though we have had our struggles, that love has been strong enough to persevere through them all.

 

You have been confident, caring, nurturing, optimistic and supportive; even when the bounds of sickness and health have been tested to their limits. You are my best friend and lover, my partner, my shoulder to cry on and the arms that I cannot imagine being without. I have always loved you. I still love you. I love you as much now as I did twenty-two years ago. And I know that at some time in the future, when we meet again, on beach in the warm sun, destined to be together, that I will love you then.

 

Today I pledge to be by your side, to be your strength when you are weak, to never leave you, to be understanding and to be the husband you deserve. I love you.’

 

Susan, would you please share your thoughts and promises with Michael?

 

[Susan’s Vows]

 

‘Michael,

 

I’ve had a difficult time trying to find the perfect words to tell you just how much you mean to me and how much love I have for you. None the less I’m going to try…

 

The night we met, I asked who wanted to ride with me and your hand went up and you said I will. I had no idea that we would still be on that ride 23 years later and that hand would hold mine as we made our way through all that life had in store for us.

 

For better or worse, in sickness and health, for richer or poorer. We have been tested by all the original vows we made. Together we have, not only survived, but triumphed.

 

Michael, you are my strength. Not only physically but more importantly, emotionally. You make me laugh. You drive me crazy. You frustrate me. You make me proud. And you make me love you more every day.

 

Today, I am reaffirming my commitment to you and our life together. I promise to be your friend and confidante, your sounding board, and your safe place. I will continue to look towards our future with optimism and excitement.

 

I love you, Michael.’

 

 

As you continue on your journey together, I encourage you to remember that as tides ebb and flow, so too do the fortunes of life. Footprints in the sand are washed away. Driftwood moves on its endless quest for a peaceful harbor. Only a deep and abiding love can withstand the tides of change in two lives.

 

May you continue to be sensitive to each other’s needs. Be open and understanding with each other. Share your thoughts and feelings out loud in the safe harbor of your relationship. Continue to bring out the best in other.

 

By the power invested in me, I now pronounce you Spaghetti and Meatballs! Michael, you may kiss your bride.

 

Friends, family, I now present to you, for the first time ever, Mr. and Mrs. Breazeale version 2.0!”

 

And yes, in case you’re wondering, their officiant was ordained by the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and she did that specifically for this occasion. It made sense considering the Breazeale’s aren’t unified in their religious beliefs.

 

“Our family is kind of like a joke.” Michael wrote in another email. “You know, “an Agnostic, a Buddhist and a Christian walk into a bar.” He was writing to answer my final question to him about what Hope means to them. And, just like a prayer, the definition of Hope is shaped by its beholder.

 

“I like what Desmond Tutu has to say about Hope. ‘I’m not an optimist because that in a sense is something that depends on feeling. More than the actual reality. We feel optimistic, or we feel pessimistic. Now hope is different, in that it is based not on the ephemarality of feelings. But on the firm ground of conviction. I believe with a steadfast faith that there can never be a situation that is utterly, totally hopeless. Hope is deeper and very close to unshakeable. It’s in the pit of your tummy.’

 

We both agree that Hope is a dynamic feeling and that it changes over time.

 

For Susan, initially that Hope was mostly defined around her MS. Her first neurologist told her that within his career “…there would be a cure for MS.” Three neurologists later there still isn’t a cure. But in the words of Archbishop Tutu she believes with a steadfast faith that her situation is not totally hopeless. When she was diagnosed with lymphoma, that Hope changed to something maybe a little more desperate. The Hope that the cancer could be cured and not end her life. The Hope that Sean and I would be able to cope with losing her, if that were to happen. The last 1.5 years have been a test for me. Anxiety and depression led me down a path of alcohol addiction. I’m in recovery and we are strong. But, some of those Hopes are now about being successful in recovery and continuing to experience joy in our lives.

 

My Hopes mirror my Buddhist philosophy. I constantly meditate about being able to choose the right paths, to help reduce her suffering to as little as possible. To choose the paths that will give her love and joy. I’m definitely a believer in reincarnation. I know with that same steadfast Hope that in the future, Susan and I will meet again. Somewhere on a beach, in the warm sun and we will know that we will have both found something special. That Hope and her Love gives me strength to continue living our love story.”

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

When Kali wrote to me about the synchronicity she’d experienced with “Hope” she concluded her email with some credits, “I thank my art, I thank our open spirits, I thank [Michael’s] beautiful wife [Susan], and I must thank Facebook … through these four a space was created in the Universe for our friendship to bloom and magic to happen.”

 

And we also would like to thank Michael and Susan for being so open to sharing their personal journey with us today. Your story has both humbled and inspired us. Last but not least, we thank Kali, for sharing her beautiful work with us here and, of course, for connecting all the dots that led to this show.

 

Be sure to visit Kali at kaliparsons.com and @kaliparsonsart on Instagram. Links to those places can be found in the show notes, along with a photo of the painting that inspired today’s episode. Sadly, not all podcast apps show the featured artwork the same way, but there’s always a link to where you can see the art included in those show notes.

 

You’ll also be able to find additional photos Michael sent me in the show notes, including the ‘Hope’ wall, so be sure to dig into that too, when you’re able.

 

If you connected with this story in any way Michael & Susan would love to hear from you. They can be reached via e-mail at michaeldbreazeale@gmail.com

 

That’s all we have for you today, thank you all so much for listening. Check back in couple of weeks and you’ll be able to hear me later. TTFN my friends.

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Art Ink – 15 – Disconnected Part 1 – A Novella Inspired by Sean Howard’s Photography

Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Sean Howard

Title of Art: Disconnected

Artist’s Website: seanhoward.ca

Instagram: @passitalong

 

Discover audio fiction podcasts on Sean’s network: fableandfolly.com

Sean Howard’s Levitation photographs

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

Hello again, my friends! It’s been awhile since I’ve last spoken to you, and I hope you didn’t think I’d gone and pod-faded on you!

Believe it or not, I haven’t taken any breaks from this show. I’ve written at least a little bit, almost daily since the last episode came out. In my head, I was sure I was writing a short story, but it didn’t want to end, I just kept writing and writing, and watching the word count grow and grow.

One day I impulsively took a break to Google the definition of a short story, because I wasn’t so sure that this writing still fit into that category anymore. By the time I’d done the search it was already well over 10,000 words, which falls into the realm of a novelette. Anyone else out there new to this literary term? Apparently that is what you call a story that’s too long to be a short story but too short to be considered a novella.

I got excited at that point because I was sure that I was almost done, and as my creativity accountability partner Amy will attest, week after week it was my goal to finish this story. I was convinced that by the time I was done writing I’d get to introduce you to my finished novelette. Yet here I am, another 10,000+ words later, and I’m quite sure this story is destined to be a full-length novel… eventually anyway. For now, I’m calling it a novella and I’m recording it for you, because you’ve waited long enough!

Today’s artist is who I’m going to blame for all of this, Sean Howard, it’s totally all your fault for creating something that inspired me so much! I was instantly triggered when I saw your work, and it sent me down a rabbit hole that was hard for me to escape.

Sean Howard is all of the things! He’s a talented speaker, podcaster, writer, brand marketer, and he’s the co-founder of Fable and Folly, a network of kick ass audio fiction podcasts, some of which he’s acted in and produced. Which is awesome for you, my listeners, because while you’re waiting around for me to put out an episode, you could be discovering a world of new podcasts over at fableandfolly.com!

As if all that talent isn’t enough to squeeze into one human, Sean is also an amazing photographer. There’s something about his Levitation series of photographs that haunt me, in a good way, and I have to say it was not easy to select just one of these photos to write about. The saying a photo is worth a thousand words doesn’t do Sean’s art any justice… and, as I’ve already shared with you, it’s provided me with thousands and thousands of words.

When you get a second, my friends, make sure you take a look at the cover art for this episode to see the haunting photograph that Sean created. For those of you who can’t look just yet, let me attempt to paint the picture with words.

 

[Art Description:]

A girl in a spaghetti-strap, teal dress hugs her knees to her chest in front of a brown brick wall. She faces left, and we see a profile of her, eyes closed tight, pink and red highlighted dreadlocks pointing wildly in every direction.

Floating around the girl, surrounding her at shoulder height, are five floating devices: a tablet and several smart phones. Sean titled this piece Disconnected, and I could think of no better title for the story that his creation helped bring to life.

Enjoy…

 

[Story:]

Jennifer was hearing phantom ring tones. Despite the fact that she’d intentionally left her phone at home, her arm still instinctively reached out at least halfway to the empty dashboard mount before she realized there was no phone to be heard.

This was the third time she’d reached out to a non-existent phone. It was as if the fucking thing was a part of her body recently amputated.

It’s not that Jennifer didn’t want to bring her phone with her, but it’d be immediately confiscated as soon as she arrived at the center anyway, and so she’d figured it’d be better to leave it home; she didn’t want to worry about strangers invading her privacy… not that she had anything to hide.

There it was again; the distinct sound of her Instagram notification. Jennifer wondered if she was telepathically connected to the damned thing, as her arm automatically rose once again. She jerked it back toward her body, and huffed. If her other hand weren’t already occupied on the wheel she would’ve smacked herself.

Wouldn’t that be ironic, thought Jennifer, if I caused another accident distracted by a phantom phone? At least this time there’d be no evidence to incriminate her. She winced as the memory flashed through her mind, placed both hands firmly on the wheel, and squeezed until her knuckles were white and her concentration was on the road.

She panicked a bit when she saw the sign for exit 34; had she passed her exit?!

She glanced down at her odometer and sighed with relief as she remembered that A: she still had 30 miles to go and B: the exit numbers were counting down, not up.

Jennifer had known that driving to an unknown area without a GPS to guide her would be a challenge, but she’d done it as a teenager, back in the MapQuest days, when she’d had to print out directions on paper. Directions that didn’t magically rearrange themselves if she drove off course, she reminded herself, and then winced as horns blared in her memory. She remembered crossing three lanes of traffic in order to avoid missing an exit on her road trip to Maryland more than a decade ago. Jennifer sighed and reminded herself to be careful and alert.

The absolute worst part of this trip, however, was the silence. Usually she had an audiobook or podcast running when she drove. Occasionally she’d put upbeat music on when she was feeling down; by the time she finished belting out a couple of songs, she always felt much better. Jennifer was sure she’d be giving herself some music therapy by now… she’d tried the radio, but there was nothing to sing along to, the crackling quality was lacking, and there were more commercials than songs.

Jennifer’s circular thoughts filled the silence instead: she was broke, she was now jobless, she’d just maxed out her credit cards on this mandatory detox, and she couldn’t start fixing any of those problems until a month from now. A month from now!!!

It wasn’t like she was addicted to heroin… no one would have to hold her dreads while she puked her way back to sobriety for fuck’s sake.

The Insta notification chimed in her mind again, and Jennifer was reaching out before she could stop herself. She sighed loudly, put her hand back on the wheel, and rolled her eyes at the fact that some unknown force was calling her bluff. Maybe I am addicted to my phone, she thought.

Still, that didn’t justify the $6,000 it cost to go through this program. $6,000 down the drain… down the future drain, Jennifer corrected herself, sighing.

Jennifer felt pretty proud when she pulled into the parking lot a couple of hours later. She hadn’t gotten lost at all. Though it’s hard to get lost when you’re in the middle of nowhere and the turn offs are sparse.

The place was huge, and very modern looking; quite the opposite of what Jennifer had imagined it would be. The entire front of the building was covered in mirrored glass. In its center rose a pyramid shaped peak that stretched well above the rest of the structure; this was covered in the only glass that wasn’t mirrored. It looked more like a shortened, more angular version of a NYC office building than a rehab center. But what did a digital detox building typically look like? Jennifer knew of no others to compare it to.

Stepping inside was like putting sunglasses on, it dimmed the outside sunshine, but not enough to make you feel like you were indoors. Faint, lyricless, music played in the background, along with what sounded like a babbling brook. Jennifer noticed a waterfall that was built into one of the walls to her left. Floor cushions that looked like low love seats and couches were scattered across the floor in front of it.

Aside from the glass, everything seemed to be made out of natural elements. The floor was made of some kind of polished stone, with glimmers of an almost holographic iridescence where the light caught it. Sculpture creatures made of dried out driftwood and metal were scattered about the lobby. A crane with it’s wings spread and a fish in its mouth here, a puppy posed in a play bow over there, and what looked like a koala bear climbing a bamboo stalk in one corner.

“Welcome,” said a voice from the wall opposite the waterfall. Jennifer turned to it.

“Hi, I’m a bit early- I was afraid I’d get lost without the GPS on my phone.”

“Oh that’s no problem, let’s get you settled into your room.”

Even though Jennifer had told her she’d left her phone at home, the girl asked to go through her bags, which felt a bit demeaning. But apparently, many guests tried to sneak in digital contraband: tablets, iPods, old smartphones people claimed were no longer connected and thought should be allowed. The website had been clear about what was and wasn’t allowed – basically anything with a screen was banned.

Satisfied that Jennifer hadn’t hidden an iPod in her underwear, the girl moved on. She handed her a thick information packet, told her that orientation would be at 6 in the Oak Room, and walked her to her room.

With four hours to kill before orientation, Jennifer dropped to the bed and started leafing through the papers. She grew bored about halfway through the second page and studied the room around her. $6,000 and there wasn’t even a TV in her room. How was she going to make it through a month without Netflix?

Jennifer glanced at the clock on her nightstand, saw that only 5 minutes had passed since she’d stepped into the room, let out a lengthy sigh, and threw herself face down into a pile of pillows.

What was she going to do for the next 3 hours and 55 minutes? The panic started to tighten her throat; what if there was an emergency and she needed to call a friend? Then she started to breathe deeply as she remembered that she’d been through this scenario before and had planned accordingly.

She opened her suitcase to find all of her solutions. On top of everything was a practically blank notebook, the first page filled with her go to contacts and their numbers… when was the last time she’d manually dialed a number?

One side of Jennifer’s suitcase was stuffed with clothing and toiletries, and the other half was packed with a pile of books and art supplies. Jennifer was a doer; doing nothing was the ultimate depressant for her – and so, in a way, her suitcase was filled with anti-depressants.

Jennifer pushed her art journal and pencils aside to reveal a pile of novels. She grabbed a Carol Goodman book, The Lake of Dead Languages, and settled into the love seat to read… she couldn’t remember the last time she’d sat down to read a physical book. She “read” books all the time, but audiobooks were her medium of choice – that way she could multitask, “reading” while she walked, cleaned, cooked, and even while she was doodling sometimes. When she was caught up with everything else.

It’d been at least a decade since she’d given her total and complete attention to a book. Pinching the thickness of the pages in both hands, Jennifer had a nostalgic sense of beginnings; just the sliver of the paperback cover and the first few pages pinched between her fingers… the excitement of so many pages ahead. She remembered that giddiness every time she’d gotten a new Goosebumps book as a child.

Jennifer got lost in the book… until a loud knock startled her back into reality.

The girl who’d checked her in was standing at the door with a serene smile. “They’re waiting for you downstairs,” she said, and on a quick glance over her shoulder, Jennifer saw that it was 6:15.

As she approached the Oak Room door it didn’t take her long to figure out the origin of it’s name. Through the massive, triangular-shaped glass wall that stretched up at least four stories was the leafy top of a giant oak tree awash in golden light. The tree had to be at least 100 years old, judging from the thick trunk. Walking into the large room was like stepping outside. There was even grass on the floor… er… ground.

Though the base of the pyramid shaped room was as big as a high school gym, for some reason all of the chairs and their mostly silent occupants were all squished together in the center of the room… aaaannnd it didn’t look like there were any empty seats left.

Jennifer stopped behind the last row of chairs and mouthed the word “sorry” to the woman facing the group, before she bared her teeth, raised her eyebrows, and winced. She crossed her legs and stood with her hands clasped in the front pocket of her hoodie, avoiding eye contact with several people who glanced back at her.

“Oh good, I didn’t want to start until everyone had arrived,” said the woman in a sickly happy high-pitched tone. She wore a form fitting teal tank top and black leggings on her petite frame, and her blonde hair was twisted into a high 2-tier bun. She waved her hand rapidly saying, “there’s an empty seat up here,” and then she pointed to the front row.

Ugh, that’ll teach me to be late, Jennifer thought as she sped to get out of the spotlight, but once she was sitting down, she was grateful to have the chair. No one likes being the odd one out.

The gratitude only lasted a minute though, because although the tiny teenage girl to her left had unnecessarily scooted over when Jennifer sat down, the man on her right hadn’t budged his man spread knee until she’d wedged her own leg between his and the seat. Even then, he’d only moved an inch, keeping his knee hovering over her personal chair space.

The girl crossed her closest leg over the other, covering the rip in her jeans with a manicured hand. The black nail polish was in stark contrast to her pale skin, and the fine sprinkling of silver glitter in it did little to lessen it.

Jennifer scooted over a bit towards her, but was unable to escape the manspreader’s hovering knee.

“Ok, welcome, for those of you who don’t know,” she looked at Jennifer, “I’m Chris, and this is orientation, but it will also double as our first meditation session, so don’t anyone disappear.” she laughed at herself.

You’d actually have to disappear to escape this room without notice, Jennifer thought, as it was at least a 30-foot trek back to the door. Jennifer hadn’t seen another exit, but she hadn’t had enough time to gawk yet. She wanted to ogle the sunset lit view out the full glass wall she’d only had a chance to glance at upon entry, or up at the strange pyramid peaked ceiling, but there’d be no unrude way to look around this close to Chris… stupid front row seat. Another reason Jennifer liked to arrive to things like this early.

“I know that some of you are here of your own free will, but most of you have been given a court order for one reason or another, and to you I say don’t underestimate the power of your addiction. Yes, you are here to be rehabilitated… digital habits are just as toxic as chemical addictions. And for that reason we take our jobs here very seriously…”

Jennifer tuned Chris out as she squeaked on about rules and consequences… and then suddenly everyone was getting up and moving their chairs. She followed the manspreader’s lead, trailing behind him with her own chair. Everyone put their folded chairs into a number of wooden chests up against the far wall. Then they turned to either side to pull rolled yoga mats from matching wooden cubbies.

She picked a purple one and hustled to find a clear spot at the back of the room. As Jennifer walked through the crowd she noticed that nearly everyone here was a kid. Some might be in their 20s, but most looked they were still in high school. Aside from Chris, Jennifer guessed she was the oldest one here. Apparently 36 was a bit old to have a digital addiction.

Luckily, Jennifer was still flexible enough to cross her legs, unlike the manspreader who was struggling on his mat in front of her as she settled down. He managed to cross his ankles, but his knees wouldn’t go down further than chest level. As he continued to fight with his knees, pushing them down, only to have them bounce back up again, Jennifer felt a giggle rising up in her throat and attempted to stop it. She pressed her lips together and clamped a hand over her face, but this only forced the giggle through her nose AND through her lips in what, all together, ended up sounding like a squeaky face fart.

Jennifer suddenly felt eyes on her, and she let her face go lax and casually glanced around the room. Well if anyone was looking at her, they weren’t now; so she examined the young people, mostly girls – she noticed, around her, feeling proud that she could still twist herself into such a position.

“Make yourself comfortable and close your eyes,” Chris started, and Jennifer did so as a soothing chime resonated for several long seconds.

There was shuffling in front of her and Jennifer opened one eye to see that the manspreader had risen and was making his way to the wall, presumably to find a comfortable position on no less than three chairs. He turned around to face the room and looked directly at her as he unfolded, and then lowered himself onto a chair.

Jennifer closed her eye quickly, feeling the heat rise up into her cheeks. He’d definitely caught her staring. And she was probably glaring at him too, unintentionally, of course. She had one of those faces – what had her friend called it? Something bitch face… oh yeah, resting bitch face. She could only imagine what resting bitch face looked like with a one-eyed glare. Probably not very friendly.

Chris’s words brought her back to the present. “Focus on your breath. Pay attention to how your body feels as you breathe in… and out.”

Am I breathing normally? Jennifer wondered. She thought she noticed her heart rate going down as she slowed her breaths.

“It’s completely normal to have thoughts enter into our meditation, hear them and let them go… observe your thoughts, and as soon as you recognize them, remind yourself to come back to your breathing, focus on your inhale… and follow it through your body as you exhale… and repeat.”

Chris was silent for a few seconds.

Jennifer exhaled and wondered how long this meditation was going to last. She should definitely post an Instagram photo of this; no one would ever believe she’d sat still for longer than 5 minutes. How long had it been anyway? She should ask once they were finished so that she could have an accurate number to add to her caption… and then Jennifer realized an Instagram photo was not going to happen. She mentally smacked her palm against her forehead.

“Let your thoughts move on,” Chris suddenly reminded her, “and come back to your breath.”

Okay… Jennifer thought, breathe in, breath out… oh my god, my foot is totally asleep. How much longer are we going to sit here? She opened an eye again and glanced around without moving her head. No one else seemed uncomfortable, and she didn’t want to disrupt the silence by shuffling around.

She switched eyes and looked towards the wall. The manspreader wasn’t even trying. He was slouched against the wall, one hand on his crotch, knees spread to the max, and when her eyes finally traveled up his body, she saw that his eyes were open, a bored expression on his face. He was looking at Chris, whose own eyes were closed as she continued to breathe deeply.

Jennifer glanced back at the manspreader, but this time he was aiming his intense gaze directly at her. She automatically snapped her eye shut and winced; she’d been caught staring at him twice now. Oh. My. God. Stop looking at this guy. He probably thinks I’m a creepy cougar, Jennifer thought, but she quickly corrected herself. I’m too young to be a cougar.

“Now we’re going to do something that may be a bit uncomfortable,” Chris said, and there was a mysterious edge to her voice. “Think of an embarrassing moment… something from your childhood maybe… something that not many people in your life now would know about.”

Jennifer was immediately transported to a college classroom. She’d gotten high, maybe a little higher than she should’ve gotten, right before class. Usually it was the audience type of learning experience versus the participation kind… Jennifer took care to categorize her classes this way to make sure she didn’t get caught in a weed driven social anxiety attack, but Professor Brinkley must’ve been experimenting that day. He’d decided to have his students take turns reading aloud… only one paragraph at a time, but the text was dense with unfamiliar four and five syllable words that Jennifer had no idea how to pronounce.

As the student in front of her started to read, Jennifer quickly read ahead, trying to prepare herself for her turn. She’d internally sighed with relief when she was finished, but then the girl in front of her had gone on… she was reading the paragraph Jennifer was supposed to read. She had become frozen with shock, and suddenly it was her turn, and she was totally unprepared.

Jennifer had stumbled through the text, gripping both sides of the desk to stop her hands from shaking. She’d sounded out at least three unknown words as if she were a second-grader, then she proceeded to butcher even the parts of the English language she did know.

Jennifer couldn’t look up in the silence that followed. No one laughed or snickered… it was an uncomfortable, pitying silence, which was confirmed with the professor’s elongated, “ooookaaay.”

The heartbeat in her ears hadn’t relented its pounding until three students later.

She’d often wondered what her classmates had thought of her that day. Jennifer would be perfectly fine with the truth: she’d gotten stupidly high… but she feared it was more likely that they thought stupid was her default setting.

“Now, it’s time to forgive yourself.” Chris’s voice intruded into the memory, “step into your past as the present version of you, older, more experienced, and bring love to the child you used to be. Give that child a hug, tell them it’s ok, tell them you forgive them, tell them that you love them. See the expression on their face when they experience this forgiveness and love. Ok, it’s now time to come back to the present moment.”

Jennifer opened her eyes slowly, and unfolded her twisted legs even slower. She’d definitely need to sit there for a few minutes to let the blood flow reach her foot; to make sure the pins and needles had run their course before she tried to walk. Jennifer pretended to stretch as everyone around her began to rise, and intentionally avoided looking up, terrified of somehow being pulled back into the manspreader’s gaze again.

Chris directed everyone to the dining hall and a soft chatter filled the air and faded away behind Jennifer as the crowd left the room.

“Not as easy as it looks, is it?” A deep voice asked, and a hand reached down to her. It was the manspreader standing over her. Looking past his hand into his face, Jennifer noticed that, though he was dressed like a teenager in a white hoodie and jeans, he was a lot older than she’d realized. Maybe even older than her.

Jennifer took his hand and let him pull her to her feet, which still felt a little tingly. He held onto her hand at the end of the gesture combining it into a handshake and said, “Matt.”

“Jennifer,” she said with a tight smile.

“You a workaholic?” he asked.

“No… I don’t think so…” Jennifer said, “why?”

“Oh… I just assumed… wait. You’re not here on a court order are you?” He asked and amusement shone in his hazel gaze.

“Yeah, actually, I am.” Jennifer said shortly. And with that she turned her back to him and marched toward the dining hall.

When she smelled the tomato-sauce-drenched main course, she grabbed an apple and a banana and made her way back to the double doors, intending to eat and read back in her room. But manspreader, Matt, stepped in front of her, blocking the way.

“You want to join me for dinner?” he asked, an empty tray in one hand.

“I was actually going to go eat in my room,” Jennifer said, a hint of irritation in her voice. What was with this guy? Her earlier embarrassment around him was quickly being replaced with annoyance at his boldness.

“Ok, well, I just wanted to apologize if I offended you before… it wasn’t intentional.”

“Ok.” She said. But he was still blocking her way out. Should she walk around him?

“Sorry.” He said.

“It’s fine.” But it wasn’t fine, Jennifer thought, it was none of his business.

And then he finally stepped away, saying, “Ok, I guess I’ll see you later.”

But Jennifer didn’t answer him as she hurried out the door and back to the comfort of her room.

She read her book until her eyes were so heavy she got stuck in a loop, reading the same paragraph again and again in between bouts of wakefulness, until she finally gave up.

The next thing she knew she was sitting straight up in bed, heart thudding, her skin tacky with sweat. She’d had a nightmare, she realized… thank god it was just that. Jennifer had woken up just before she’d hit someone, someone else, she thought as she recalled the dream woman’s fear-twisted face through the rain-smeared windshield. She’d had a yellow umbrella and it had cast her skin in a shade of jaundice.

Jennifer didn’t see it happen, but the sense of speed and lack of control as she’d dropped the phone, gripped the wheel and punched the brake pedal to the floor… it made her almost certain that the hit had to be fatal.

Was this the Universe trying to warn her? Trying to make her take her “crime” more seriously? Not cool, Universe, not cool.

She let herself fall back into the pillow, which was now damp and cold and not at all comforting. The EHH, EHH, EHH of the alarm clock jarred her upright again, and once she could finally figure out how to shut the archaic thing up, Jennifer let out a long sigh. She thought of how, if she’d had her phone, she’d be woken up gently as a harp played, slowly increasing in volume as it went. She groaned as she got up; there wasn’t much time to get ready before her 1-on-1 with Chris.

Jennifer brushed her teeth furiously with one hand as she pulled socks off with the other, hopping a couple times to keep from losing her balance. The contrast of blonde on black automatically drew her gaze away from her brown eyes, and she sighed through her nose so as to avoid spewing toothpaste everywhere. She couldn’t even afford to buy a cheap bottle of dye, not unless she wanted to add to her already Everest high mountain of debt, and the pink had long since faded from her short dreadlocks.

Jennifer hadn’t taken a single selfie since… she’d thought about going with black and white photos, tried every filter there was, but nothing looked right alongside the colorful art in her feed; too off-brand.

Luckily, she didn’t have the time to dwell on it. She rinsed, spit, turned away from her reflection and its reminder of all her problems, and got in the shower.

Fifteen minutes later, Jennifer passed into Chris’s office with her clothes clinging to her still damp skin, but at least she wasn’t late, she affirmed to herself as she glanced at the clock. It was 7:29, one minute to spare.

Office was a formal word for the comfy, brightly colored room. There was no desk, no file cabinets, and it was as if a box of markers had thrown up on the walls. The glossy white walls were floor to ceiling dry erase boards, and they were almost completely covered in writing and drawings. Here and there were rectangular patches of black chalkboard paint, which were equally scribbled upon in pale pastels. An L-shaped couch, a love seat, and a few chairs were arranged in a circle that surrounded a bunch of beanbag chairs on the floor. The room looked more suited to a teenage hangout than an office. Jennifer took a seat on a vibrantly green, velvety soft sofa.

“How are you settling in Jennifer?” Chris asked from her seat on a hot pink chair; hers was equally velvety looking. Her hands were laid one atop the other in her lap.

“Well, my wake up wasn’t fun, but aside from that… fine.” Jennifer knew that no digital devices were allowed on the premises, but she’d thought for sure that an exception would be made for the people who ran this place. But even if not, shouldn’t Chris at least have a notebook, a folder to reference… something?

“Yes, you had quite the nightmare, didn’t you?”

“No,” Jennifer said, her gaze scanning above Chris’s head to a long, twisting, Chinese-style dragon drawn in red, “it wasn’t the nightmare I was talking about, it was the alarm cl—wait,” she interrupted herself, her eyes darting back to Chris, “How did you know about my nightmare? Are there hidden cameras in my room?”

“No, there are no cameras in your room,” said Chris, “along with being immoral, that would also be illegal.”

“Then… how did you know about my nightmare?”

“The same way I know about the manspreader.” Chris smiled broadly and raised her eyebrows expectantly.

“Who?” Jennifer began to mentally retrace the past 24 hours, but she couldn’t remember saying that aloud to anyone. Had she secretly been hypnotized during the meditation, caught muttering her inside jokes aloud?

“Hypnotism is something we can do here,” Chris responded, unprompted, “but I assure you, you have not been hypnotized.”

Chris paused for a moment, as if to let that sink in. Jennifer was stunned into silence.

“I hope you’ll forgive my intrusion,” Chris continued, “unfortunately, it’s the only way I’ve found to get through to most people… do you know why you’re here Jennifer?”

“Because it was this or lose my license.”

“Yes… that’s true. You’ve got three counts of texting and driving on your record… but I’m not asking you about your crime Jennifer, I’m asking if you know what you’ve come here to learn. Any idea?”

“How to promise I won’t do it again?… and mean it, since you apparently can read my mind.”

“Let’s go about this a different way. What have you experienced since you last had your phone?”

“I’ve felt… lost. Like something’s missing. Like I’m missing something.” Jennifer paused, but Chris nodded for her to continue. “I feel out of the loop. Disconnected.”

“Yes! You feel disconnected, and rightfully so. You know, smartphones have only been around for the past couple of decades, and in that time we’ve somehow conditioned ourselves to be completely reliant on them for our connection to everything.”

Jennifer couldn’t dispute that. The past day had been a challenge to say the least. She nodded.

Chris went on, “but what if I told you that you could be trained to connect to others, to this world, to this Universe, in ways that you could never imagine… in ways that would make your phone seem subpar?”

“What, you want to teach me how to read minds?” Jennifer asked doubtfully.

“You already know how to connect to others, you’ve had at least one big hit since you’ve been here.”

“What do you mean?”

“That wasn’t just a nightmare, Jennifer, it was a memory… someone else’s memory.”

Jennifer thought back to her dream. It was a bit fuzzier now, but she could still recall most of it: the phone in her hand, white screen blazing in the dimly lit interior, though the words she’d read were totally lost now, and the yellow-skinned woman with wide eyes. But wait… Jennifer went back to the phone in her hand… had it been her hand? Had it been her car? It was hard to tell. It’d been dark.

“Whose memory?”

“Well that wouldn’t be very fun, now would it?” Chris said with a smirk. “You’re here for a month, you’ll have plenty of time to figure it out.”

Jennifer headed to the dining hall after that. She walked through the food line in a daze, trying to remember the details of her nightmare. Could it really be a memory? Jennifer would’ve found that hard to believe before her strange encounter with Chris, but she also would’ve thrown mindreading into the same box; passing it off as just another sci-fi element, along with teleportation and time travel. There was no doubt, though. Unless Jennifer was truly losing it, there was no other explanation for Chris knowing about her dream… or the fact that she had internally nicknamed the manspreader.

Speak of the spreader himself, as Jennifer was exiting the line he was waving her over to his table. Her impulse was to pretend she hadn’t seen him and return to her room like she had last night, but she had so many questions about this place now, and maybe some of these other digi detoxees could answer them. At least this time he wasn’t alone, the ripped jeans girl who’d sat on the other side of her in the Oak room was at the table too.

Jennifer took a deep breath and headed toward them. “Hey,” she said with a forced smile she hoped didn’t look it. “Matt right?” she started, looking at the manspreader, but she didn’t wait for him to answer before she shifted her gaze to the girl, “I didn’t get your name.”

“Karen,” the girl said, extending her hand. Her long, almost black, hair was shiny, sleek, and straight. With her bangs, the way it hung was like a three-sided picture frame around her face, all hard edges and contrast.

“Jennifer.” She shook the girl’s hand over the table, and noticed that the black nail polish from yesterday had been replaced with fire engine red.

“We were just talking about Karen’s 1-on-1,” Matt said, “did you have yours yet?”

“Yeah, just before I came here,” Jennifer said, “wasn’t exactly what I’d expected.”

“Me neither, but the idea that we’ve somehow stumbled upon a school for psychic development makes it so much more interesting. Don’t you think?” Karen asked, but didn’t wait for an answer. “I mean if going through this detox is mandatory, we may as well get something useful out of it. I’m actually excited now.”

“I mean it’d be cool, I’m not debating that… but do you think it’s even possible?” Matt countered. “I’m not entirely convinced.”

“I wasn’t either, at first,” Karen said, “but Chris knew things… she knew things I’ve never told anyone.”

“Like what?” Matt asked, a smirk on his face.

“Chris knowing is bad enough, I’m sure as hell not telling you.” Karen said looking at him like she had a bad taste in her mouth. After a pause she started again, “But, I will say that I think that whole embarrassing moment thing she made us do during the meditation was a way for her to get material.”

“Material?” Jennifer said.

“Yeah, you know, to prove this shit to us.” Karen explained.

“Well that’s not gonna work on me,” Matt replied, leaning back and crossing his arms over his chest, “I couldn’t think of anything embarrassing. I was barely able to focus on meditating in the first place.”

“Well you’ll see,” Karen said assuredly, “when you go to your 1-on-1.”

Matt only shrugged and switched his gaze. “What about you, Jennifer?” he asked.

“I guess I’m still trying to absorb all of this.” She paused to eat a spoonful of bland oatmeal. She’d piled brown sugar on top and mixed it in, but barely tasted it. “My inner skeptic is still trying to convince me there’s a reasonable explanation for what just happened; but she’s having trouble finding one.”

“Yeah,” Matt agreed, “like maybe our friends and family are in on some elaborate practical joke?”

“But there’s no way,” Jennifer was shaking her head. “Chris was reading the thoughts in my head as I was thinking them.”

“Yeah, she did the same thing to me.” Karen said. “Look, I’m not saying I’m entirely convinced we’ll be able to do this mind reading thing anytime soon. But I have no doubt that Chris has some crazy skills… makes total sense now why we have to be here for so long… but yeah, I’m willing to give it a go. Think of what we could do.”

“Yeah…” Matt’s smirk returned, wider than ever, “Well I guess only time will tell.”

They were all quiet for awhile as they finished eating.

“Hey we still have an hour until the next group meeting,” Matt said. “Who’s up for a walk?”

“I’m down,” said Karen quickly, “the weather’s supposed to be gorgeous today.”

Matt and Karen both looked at Jennifer expectantly. “Ok, you’ve convinced me,” she said on a sigh.

“Well don’t let us twist your arm,” Matt said, but he smiled.

“No, I could use the fresh air, and who knows, this could be the last of the nice weather, we should definitely take advantage of it.”

***

Matt was much taller than Karen and Jennifer, and he stopped several times to let them catch up to him before he found their pace. It was still a bit chilly out, but the sun on their backs was comfortably warm, and grew warmer as it rose.

“So, Karen,” Matt began, “you said earlier that this is mandatory for you…” he glanced at her before continuing, “care to indulge our curiosity.”

Karen shrugged. “Sure, I’ve got nothing to hide. It’s kinda stupid actually. Long story short, I got my three strikes and here I am. But it’s impossible not to text and drive when most of your “driving,” she used air quotes, “is actually idling in dead stopped traffic, ya know? Plus, I can’t do my job without my phone, I’m an Uber driver… so in reality, I never actually texted anyone. My dash mount broke and I had an unlucky week with cops, what can I say? What about you?”

So apparently Karen was older than she looked too, because Jennifer was pretty sure you had to be at least 21 to be an Uber driver.

“I checked myself in voluntarily,” Matt said, “but not until after I had a wake up call.” He paused for two or three paces, then continued on a bit reluctantly. “I’m kind of a workaholic. I was driving out to dinner after a late night at work, it was raining, pouring actually, and I was waiting for an important email. My phone went off, and it was just so automatic the way I grabbed for it… anyway, I took one hand off the wheel at the same time I hit a stretch of deep water. I dropped the phone as soon as I started hydroplaning, but it happened so fast, and before I had both hands on the wheel again I’d already done a 180 and was flying off the road. The next thing I knew I’d slammed sideways into a tree.”

“Wow,” Jennifer stopped walking, “were you hurt?”

“Not at all, but I can’t stop myself from wondering what could’ve happened if there was another car nearby… what if I’d hurt someone else? Killed someone? And all because of a stupid email? I’d never be able to forgive myself.”

“Well, you didn’t,” Karen gave Matt a friendly pat on the back, “and you’re here to make sure it doesn’t happen again, right? So don’t worry about it.”

Matt nodded and they started walking again. The path they’d taken looped around a large pond, and they were nearly back to where they’d started again.

“I worry about the same thing,” Jennifer broke the silence. She hadn’t planned on airing out her own skid marks, but Matt’s unexpected vulnerability made Jennifer feel like she owed it to him to be honest herself. “Though… I have to admit I don’t think it has anything to do with needing to digitally detox.” Jennifer started, she was about to bring up the nightmare since that was the main instigator of her recent fears, but she quickly decided against it. If that nightmare was a memory like Chris said, it most likely belonged to someone here, and who was she to tell someone else’s story. Plus, it had an uncomfortable number of similarities to Matt’s story. Could that be a coincidence? Was her dream off? Was he hiding part of the story?

“I actually did hit someone.” Jennifer admitted, and Matt and Karen both stopped simultaneously to turn toward her. “He was fine,” she quickly continued, a bit defensively, “but the fact is, it would’ve happened whether I had my phone with me or not.” Jennifer could probably squeeze between the two of them and keep walking, and that was what she wanted to do most, but she also didn’t want it to look like she was hiding anything either, so she stopped too.

“I was pulling out of this gas station. It’s on a busy road, so you can’t make a left there, but there’s a yield sign to go right. Sometimes you get lucky and catch a gap in traffic when the light down the road changes, but most of the time you have to sit there and wait.” Jennifer paused here as if her audience needed time to paint the scene in their heads. “So I was waiting and waiting, and my phone went off; it was a text from my friend checking on my ETA, so I tapped the screen to read it. Then I told Siri to text her back that I was on my way. I looked to the left and saw there was finally a gap I could cut into, I hit the gas as the last car was passing in front of me, but as I turned my head to face forward there was something in front of me, and I slammed on my brakes to stop from hitting it. But it was too late. My car jerked forward a couple of feet and stopped, and suddenly there was a man in front of me sprawled in the road.

“I tried to help him, but he got up all on his own before I could make it to him. He was furious, waving his arms at me, screaming that he saw me looking down at my phone. He called the police. And sure enough, they believed him as soon as they saw the time on my last text matched the time he’d reported the accident. It didn’t help that I already had a couple of texting and driving tickets on my record.

“What pisses me off the most though is that I was trying to do better! I got one of those stupid mounts so I could be ‘hands free’ and I hadn’t typed out a single text since my last ticket. And I wasn’t even driving!!!” Jennifer took a moment to breathe away her fury.

“Plus,” she continued in a much calmer voice, “I’ve turned out of that parking lot so many times. I never look right. There’s not even a shoulder on that road. It’s not the kind of road you should be out taking a stroll on. So I’m sure I would’ve hit him anyway.”

Karen was suddenly laughing, “So,” she started, but she was cracking up and couldn’t spit out the words. “So,” she said again once she could get control over herself, “you mean to tell me that guy saw you NOT look at him and decided to walk in front of your car anyway?” Again, laughter burst out of her, and Matt and Jennifer couldn’t help but be infected by it, letting out a few of their own chuckles.

“Yeah,” Jennifer said starting to catch a bit of Karen’s contagious laughter, “probably not his brightest moment.”

“That guy wouldn’t last two seconds in the city.” Karen said with a shake of her head.

Matt was chuckling a bit now too, though Jennifer could tell he was trying not to. “We are such assholes for laughing about this.”

“Why?” Karen said, “It’s not like he died… of anything other than embarrassment, maybe.”

“Ya know, that’s probably so true,” Jennifer said, “I never said it at the time, but I thought he was totally overreacting. I mean, if he had the energy to jump up and wave his arms around at me the way he was…” Jennifer was laughing again. “I’ve seen toddlers with less energetic temper tantrums.”

The laughter and the rest of their walk wound down as the trio reached the end of the trail. The paved pathway spread out into a parking lot before them.

“Just in time,” Matt said, glancing at his watch, “we have 10 minutes until our next group meeting.”

“Perfect,” said Karen, “I’m gonna grab something from my car quick, and run it over to my room.” She veered to the left towards a bright red Mazda RX8 and opened the passenger side door.

Something about the car was familiar to Jennifer, but with the only eye-catching paint job in a lot full of neutral blacks, whites, and silvers, she assumed she must’ve noticed it when she pulled in yesterday.

“You can use that for Uber?” Matt asked. “I thought all of their cars needed to have four doors.”

“Well, technically it has four doors,” Karen said as she reached in behind the seat and pulled open a surprise back door. “But you’re right, this is my personal car, and not at all Uber-approved, which is good, because if anyone threw up in this car, I’d be pissed.” She grabbed a small storage container out of the back seat and gently bumped both doors closed with her hip.

As Karen got closer Jennifer recognized the case’s colorful contents. “That’s a lot of nail polish!”

“Yeah, well, we’ve got a lot of time to kill,” Karen shot back, glancing at Jennifer’s nails as she did, “oooooohhhwww, you’ve got some blank canvases for me.” She raised her eyebrows in question.

“If you really want to,” Jennifer agreed half-heartedly, “I mean, there’s not much there—”

“Oh please, help a girl out,” Karen pleaded, “I’m doing my own daily, and it doesn’t take up nearly as much time as I need it to.”

“Ok,” Jennifer chuckled. Internally she wondered how she was going to keep from poisoning herself the next time she unconsciously bit her nails.

“You think we scared the big guy off?” Karen asked, and Jennifer noticed that Matt had somehow gotten ahead of them. He was already pulling open the glass doors some 50 feet ahead of them.

“Maybe… but he doesn’t seem like the type to scare easily,” Jennifer replied.

“I’m sure I could fix that with one ride.” Karen winked.

“I hope you’re talking about a ride in your car.”

“Of course! What kind of girl do you think I am?” As Karen made her way across the wide open lobby toward her room, she giggled in a way that made Jennifer wonder.

A few minutes later they’d joined the rest of the group in the Oak Room and were once again preparing themselves for another guided meditation.

When Matt tried to slink back to his comfort zone against the wall, Chris followed him. She gently pulled him to his feet, lifted the chair he’d been sitting on, and folded it. She looked up at him, paused. Matt had a shit-eating grin on his face. They were too far away to hear, but in a flash Matt’s forehead furrowed in shocked confusion, holding his mouth open like the shit had fallen right out. Chris turned around, bringing the chair closer to the group. She had a serene smile on her lips, but her eyes wore a cockier expression, like they were screaming “HA! Gotcha!”

“Does anyone want to go get something warmer to wear?” she addressed the group as she pulled a sweatshirt on over her tank and returned to her mat. “Once the sun’s gone it’ll get pretty chilly in here.”

A few people looked upward to the endlessly blue sky that shone through the clear panes above, but nobody moved from their seats.

The pyramid shaped room was basically a green house and Jennifer was grateful for the toasty temperature. Although it was comfortable outside while Jennifer was walking, once she’d slowed down in the parking lot, any hint of a breeze had bit into her skin.

“Anyone?” Chris tried again, but still no one budged from their seats. “Ok, then let’s begin, shall we?” She gave her tiny bell a tap and a familiar chiming vibrated through the large space for several seconds.

Chris led the group to focus on their breathing as she did before, and after a few minutes of that she guided them into full relaxation. “Notice how the top of your head feels, relax your scalp. Feel any tension in your face… and let it go. Let the skin on your forehead go slack, relax your cheeks, your jaw…” and she went on to bring attention to every bit of Jennifer’s tense body. Odd how you didn’t even realize your jaw was clenched until someone told you to unclench it, Jennifer thought. By the time Chris had reached her toes, Jennifer was so relaxed she felt like her skin had melted off; but in a good way.

“Focus on the sounds seeping into your ears,” Chris said softly, “let the noise gradually get louder, until you start to recognize it…”

The orangey glow that’d shown through Jennifer’s closed eyelids gradually faded to black. At the same time the staticky sound of nothing grew louder until she knew what it was. Rain. Jennifer opened her eyes to confirm it. The blue above had been replaced by a dark gray and it was pouring.

Only Chris still had her eyes closed, everyone else was looking up in wonder. Jennifer hugged herself and rubbed her arms as the temperature quickly dropped.

Without opening her eyes, Chris said, “I warned you that it would get chilly.” Then, after a pause, “Well I guess we’re done meditating for now,” she said and finally opened her eyes to look at everyone in front of her.

The group broke for lunch and afterwards, Chris divided them up. Most everyone had taken the opportunity to bundle themselves up before returning to the chilly, gray Oak Room, but it turned out that only half of them would be needing the extra clothing.

As Chris directed them all to form two neat lines, Jennifer felt like she was back in elementary school about to march out to recess. She was at the back of the line, Karen stood in front of her, and Matt towered in the next spot. But that’s where the nostalgia ended, as Chris instructed the group to turn sideways to face the opposing line. There just so happened to be an even amount of people in the room, and Chris told them all to pair off with the person directly in front of them.

Jennifer was mildly disappointed, as she seemed to already be losing her recently found companionship with this forced partnering. She walked toward the blonde girl across from her and offered a weak half smile. Jennifer was trying to be warm, but she had a feeling her face was suggesting more of a well-I-guess-I-don’t-have-a-say-in-this look. It was the same kind of smile one of two team leaders in a high school gym class might give you when it’s his turn to pick and you’re the last one standing.

“Hi,” Jennifer tried to warm up her smile as she extended a hand to the girl, “I’m Jennifer.” The girl reminded her of Baby Spice, minus the slutty attire and pigtails.

“Emma,” she said quietly.

No way, Jennifer thought, wasn’t that Baby Spice’s real name? She wished for the instant gratification of a quick Google, and she wondered if she’d ever stop wanting to Google and Instagram things every hour on the hour.

The brief introduction was all they had time for, though, because Chris was already separating them again. Those who were from Emma’s line were directed to make themselves comfortable beneath the oak tree, while Jennifer, Karen, Matt, and the rest of their group followed Chris back to her teen hangout of an office.

When they walked in the room seemed brighter than it had been earlier, and at a second glance, Jennifer realized it was because the shiny, white walls had been wiped clean.

“Take a seat for now,” Chris said as she spread her arms out and stepped to the side.

“We’re going to do a mini-meditation.” She continued as Jennifer planted herself beside Karen on the velvety green couch. “By now, your partners have been given their own instructions… to send you a message. Your job is to receive that message.”

A few people were exchanging skeptically raised eyebrows, one guy rolled his eyes shaking his head slowly back and forth, someone nearby shrugged their shoulders at him and returned their attention to Chris, who was making her way to an empty beanbag chair towards the room’s center. She practically fell into it on one arm, stretched herself out like a cat, and crossed her ankles.

“Before we begin, I just want you all to know that you can feel free to get up at any time. These messages can be fleeting, and as soon as you sense something, I encourage you to note it on the walls.”

Everyone started looking around the room, a couple with confused looks on their faces. “They’re dry erase boards,” Chris clarified before anyone could ask, “you’ll find markers scattered around, take your pick. Any words, images, shapes, feelings, sounds… anything that comes to you, make sure to record it on the wall. This is a way to communicate more than it’s a test of your artistic capabilities… so please don’t hold back. We welcome chicken scratch and stick figures.

Chris paused as she looked around the room with a smirk on her face, and Jennifer wondered if she might be waiting for her audience to laugh. “Any questions?” she finally asked.

Jennifer had a few: Are you serious right now? How do you expect us to do that exactly? Is this for real, or have I somehow found myself in an American accented episode of Black Mirror?, but they all came out sounding incredulous in her mind, so she remained silent.

When no one uttered a word, Chris went on, “Close your eyes and clear your mind by focusing on your breath, like we’ve been doing, and once you’re relaxed, bring your attention to your partner. Imagine them sitting in the grass beneath the Oak tree, you’re standing in front of them, you look down at your hands and notice that they’re semi-transparent; you’re in the Oak Room in spirit.” Chris quickened her pace, “now merge into your partner, become one with them, feel what they’re feeling, hear what they’re hearing…”

Despite the energy in Chris’s voice, it seemed to be getting more distant in Jennifer’s ears, and suddenly she heard another voice… it was slightly familiar, but she couldn’t place it. “Imagine them in your mind’s eye, whisper your message, whisper your message, whisper your message…” but now that voice was fading away too, and Jennifer was sitting down on top Emma, falling into her body—

A red umbrella, it’s handle up in the air, flashed into Jennifer’s mind, and though she saw no hand holding it steady, it was balanced perfectly like a non-spinning top. And before she even knew what she was doing, Jennifer found herself at the board drawing what she’d seen. When she was done, she was embarrassed to see several sets of eyes staring at her curiously. She quickly made her way back to the couch, noting on the way that nobody else had drawn a thing… Jennifer’s upside-down umbrella was the only image that graced the walls.

“Very good,” Chris mouthed to her, and then out loud, “I’m going to give you 5 more minutes to focus on the message your partners are sending you, and then I’m going to ask you all to doodle your findings on the board… whether or not you think you’ve received anything.”

Someone sighed loudly, frustrated. Jennifer let out her own sigh; though hers was one of relief.

As everyone else focused with furrowed brows, Jennifer reimagined the experience she’d just had. It was a strange thing to admit, but this vivid umbrella had felt like it’d come from outside of her. She’d always had a vivid imagination, could create and see things in her mind’s eye… but she couldn’t trace this ‘vision’ – for lack of a better term – back through any stream of consciousness that’d come from her own thoughts. It was like a unicorn darting out from a herd of elephants.

“Ok,” Chris called out, “time’s up. Whether you think you have answers or not, go on, grab some markers and head to a clean space on the wall.”

A chorus of sighs and groans sounded as everyone stood and trudged over to the boards.

“You haven’t failed yet, so don’t make assumptions,” Chris said, “just write or draw the first thing that pops into your head. This is your first attempt at something you’ve probably never done before, and just like with any other skill, some of you will find your strengths in different areas. We’re all like radios, and you’ll find that you tune into certain stations more easily than others. Right now we’re just experimenting with the dial to see what we can pick up on.”

Karen had a blue marker and was rapidly scribbling a manifesto in tiny letters. Jennifer couldn’t read any of it from her spot on the couch. Next to Karen, Matt was adding pigtails to one of the 5 stick figures he’d drawn. A few others were adding their own embellishments to the wall, but more than half of the class stood stationary in front of a blank space.

“Don’t think about it,” Chris said to those paralyzed people, and she snapped her fingers as she went on, “first thing you think right now, put it on the board. We’re just playing a game here. There’s no penalty for a wrong answer. The only way you can fail here is if you don’t try.” That finally got the few remaining stragglers to add their own hasty additions in an effort to return to their seats quickly.

“Good job everyone.” Chris made eye contact with each and every person in the room before she finally dismissed them to lunch. Apparently they’d be going over their work once they’d reassembled later that afternoon. Jennifer looked forward to that with a mixed sense of excitement and dread, like she was just cresting the peak of the tallest point on a rollercoaster, waiting for the inevitable drop.

Karen looped her arm around Jennifer’s and leaned into her, “if we hurry up and eat we’ll have enough time to do our nails before the next meet,” she whispered conspiratorially.

***

“So what was all that you were writing on the board?” Jennifer asked as she stretched her arm out to Karen.

Karen applied a mauve polish to Jennifer’s pointer finger in three quick, neat strokes and moved on to her middle finger. Without looking up she said, “The lyrics to a song that was running through my head.”

“What song?”

“Let it Go.”

“From Frozen?”

“Yup.” She was already done painting the nails on Jennifer’s right hand, and reached out for her left.

“Do you think that has anything to do with your partner’s ‘message?’ ”

“I dunno.” Then after a pause and another couple of painted fingernails, “but I guess we’ll find out,” Karen said finishing off on Jennifer’s pinky and finally looking up. She shrugged. “The real question is,” she said as she rummaged through her box of polish and pulled out a trio of bottles, one after the other, and laid them out on the bedspread in between them, “Red Red Wine, Lotus, or Garnet Star?”

Jennifer hunched over and squinted at them, the hues were nearly indiscernible in the dim indoor light. “What’s wrong with the color you have on now?” she asked as she picked them up and twisted to get a better look beneath the lampshaded light.

“Uh, they’re chipped,” Karen said, in a way that implied Jennifer was a bit thick, and thrust her ring finger towards her to prove it.

Again, Jennifer found herself in a game of find the difference searching Karen’s pristine nail for a defect. Finally she noticed a minuscule amount of missing polish on one corner of her squarely shaped nails. “Ahh,” Jennifer said, returning her gaze to the trio of dark purpley reddish colors in her hand. “This may seem like a dumb question, but, why not just paint over the chip? Or just redo that one nail?”

“I mean I might in a pinch, if I had somewhere to be,” Karen snorted, “but what else do we have to do?”

Jennifer nodded and handed her the color labeled “Lotus.” All three colors were too dark in Jennifer’s opinion, but that one was a shade brighter than the others.

As Karen silently began scrubbing at her nails with a cotton ball, Jennifer blew on her own nails, contemplating whether or not she should pursue the topic further. Karen seemed completely uninterested in the strange exercise they’d just performed, as if they’d just come out of a math class where they were learning obvious facts like two plus two equals four, and it was all mundane enough to be forgotten. But Jennifer had experienced something profound; something unexplainable. She’d had an out of body experience. She’d had a vivid vision! Like she was straight out of the pages of some supernatural thriller, playing the role of the reluctant psychic being drawn into a murder mystery. Even though the validity of what she’d seen had yet to be officially confirmed, Jennifer held a strange certainty that it would be.

 

[Conclusion:]

Don’t worry, my friends, there’s much more to come. If you’re listening to this in the week that it goes live, you can expect Part 2 of Disconnected next week. If you’re listening to this from the future, it’s you’re lucky day, and you can dive into Part 2 right now!

Thank you to Sean Howard for inspiring me with your art and for your generosity in sharing it with us as this podcast’s cover art. Please, please, please, check that out when you get a minute, and visit Sean over at fableandfolly.com to discover new fiction podcasts. I’d recommend you check the show notes to find a link to the rest of Sean’s Levitation series, too, I promise you won’t be sorry!

Much love goes to my Patrons Jennifer, Matt, Karen, and Chris whose continued support for this show is much appreciated. Words seem a dim representation for my gratitude, but I hope you all know that it’s there in a big way.

I have a bit more to share about the kind people my characters were named after at the end of Part 2, but for now, it’s time for me to get crackin’ so I don’t leave ya’ll hangin’ for too long.

I’ll be bok, I hope you’ll hear me there!

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Art Ink – 13 – All The Other 9/11s – A Short Story Inspired by Dave Conrey’s Art

 

 

 

Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Dave Conrey

Title of Art: Infinite Possibility

Artist’s Website: daveconrey.com

Instagram: @daveconrey

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

Email Bek at bekah@rebekahnemethy.com for any feedback

 

GET ALL OF MY ART FOR $1 RIGHT NOW ON PATREON! For real, but it’s only open to the 1st 100 people who sign up, so do it now, before it’s too late.

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

Hello my friends, welcome back to one of my favorite places to be, digging into the creative zone that is this podcast. Back when I was in high school I always thought I’d be a writer, it was the thing that all of my teachers, family, and even many of my friends, expected me to be. I wrote a little bit of fiction back then, but at this point, I’m sure I’ve written more fiction for Art Ink than I did throughout all of high school and college.

 

I have to admit that these most recent experiences are so much more satisfying than any fiction writing I did back then. Maybe it was because that back then I still believed in the need to have gatekeepers validate my work, and possibly it was also the fact that I wasn’t equipped with the knowledge I have now about how to push through the excuses many of us make about why we don’t create the work we feel compelled to do, but I also know that reading the words aloud does something to manifest these stories in way that just feels more complete. Which is really interesting because a few years ago speaking into a microphone seemed scarier than skydiving without a parachute… and now… now it might be the thing that most motivates me to write; so I can make the words come alive.

 

This is one of the stranger stories I’ve written, and I think that’s why I love it so much. It has many layers to it, and I’ll discuss some of that at the end of this episode, but first, I’m sure you’re dying to know whose artwork is gracing the cover of today’s show.

 

Dave Conrey is a well-rounded artist I’ve been following for many years. He’s also a designer, a writer, a fellow podcaster, and an advocate for artists. Before I even had the vagina to call myself an artist he was one of the voices in my head, I binged on all of his podcast episodes, read all of his books, and I soaked it all up like a parched, shrunken sponge.

 

Dave is one of the few artists out there who has helped me to realize that I’m not alone in more than one way. I’m not the only one who has a passion for multiple forms of creative expression. I’m not the only one who struggles through this curvy path of choosing to live the most creative life possible. I’m not the only one making it all up as I go along, taking the risks and rewards one day at a time.

 

I used to be really afraid of change… who am I kidding,

it still terrifies the fuck out of me… but it also leads to some of the most fun and fulfilling moments of my life. Things that, many times, are totally unexpected and couldn’t have happened any other way.

 

I’ve watched Dave’s evolution with awe. Back when I first started listening to him, he wasn’t making any visual art at all, at least not publicly. I mean, he was creating plenty of content, which is still art in my book, but I’m talking about watching Dave’s Instagram erupt with design and mixed media art. His work is edgy and avant garde. I’m totally not an art critic and, in all honesty, I’m not sure I used that term right… it actually sounds a bit pretentious… and whatever the opposite of pretentious is… that is what Dave’s art is to me. It’s messy, but in the most visually appealing way possible. It’s a bit grungy. I love it!

 

So let’s get into the beautiful mess that is the piece of art that prompted today’s story… shall we?

 

 

[Art Description:]

 

There’s so much to this mixed media piece that I have to stress that you take a look at it yourself whenever you can. If you can’t see the cover art in your podcast app then check the episode description for the link.

 

One of my favorite things about abstract art is how perspective can change so much about what it becomes to each individual viewer. What I see may not be what you see. That’s also a disclaimer.

 

In the middle of this painting is a deep sapphire blue wave, at the very center the blue is more muted, and this is where the stacked words “INFINITE POSSIBILITY” stem from, stretching across the right center of the piece. Below the words the blue deepens and blends into a couple of thick black strokes, with thin streaks of yellow, that swoop down and to the left. Slashing across the top of the blue black wave an orange streak underlines part of the word, “POSSIBILITY,” and curves sharply down to the right corner. Bits of black peek through the orange, it’s almost like a creature of some sort is hiding behind it, gripping it with a single monstrous hand. A pink and black animal of some sort, a made up one for sure, because I can’t name it, rides atop the orange stroke beneath “BILITY.”

 

So heading clockwise, from the bottom right corner, we’re back in those black strokes that led down from the blue center and then end in two circularly stroked patches of pink. The top-most pink paint looks like half of a record, brush streaks thin the paint in the center of the stroke revealing the blue and black beneath. To the bottom left of the pink half record is a larger pink section shaped like a squished half moon, and inside that squat moon is a black silhouette, it could be the reflection of a surfer or maybe a dancer.

 

Still heading around the clock, skipping over a large unpainted area of white at 7 o’clock, we land on the bottom of a backwards C of orange paint that stretches from 8 o’clock to 9. Jagged, blocky veins of black paint cover much of the orange and lead both down to the pink and back up to a bold red spray-painted circle dripping blood like a bullet wound. A fine mist of red speckles the pale blue and pink below the red wound and also spots the orange C and the white space running down the left side of the art.

 

At 9 o’clock, just to the left of the red, orange, and black is another jagged black line, thicker than the veiny lines below, that leads up and curves to 11 o’clock where it ends at an angry looking black eye. Orange fills the space beneath half of this eye, and to the left a thick downward stroke of orange fills the top corner.

 

Remember we’ve been circling around this deep blue center area, and so at 12 o’clock, just above where the sapphire blue comes to a point and to the right of the eye, yellow and green paint fill a space that, along with the eye, looks like a short, pointy elephant trunk that stretches diagonally across the page. The forehead area of the elephant’s face is muted blue and white at the top center.

 

Following the same slightly diagonally line created in yellow and green, 3 squares of pink are situated from forehead to center trunk. A thick pink stroke lies parallel along the rest of the trunk downward to the word “INFINITE.” Black lines edge some of the pink squares and are scribbled through the thicker stroke. To the right of the pink paint, more black lines, strokes, and dots lead down to the words. They remind me of dominos.

 

Dave’s message to the artist is worth quoting. Along with his Instagram post of Infinite Possibility he wrote: “If you knew you could not fail, what would you go after? What dream would you chase down? At the crossroads of purpose and passion exists infinite possibility. Now, in order to realize that infinite possibility, you have to drive your ass down to the corner of hard work and due diligence.”

 

I couldn’t agree more with Dave’s words. Well most of it… I don’t really think it’s supposed to be hard… we just believe it’s supposed to be, so it is.

 

I do however believe in Infinite Possibility, and along with those words and some of visuals my perspective pulled from Dave’s creation, another story was born. I call this one, All the Other 9/11s…

 

[Story:]

 

September 11th, 2001 – 12:02 pm

 

Dakota: I woke up late, feeling strangely heavy. Now there’s… this… fascinating presence inside of me. Clear words that aren’t mine; memories, too, vivid ones. I’m just going to let it all out, before it goes away. I don’t have much time.

 

In all 123,321 universions I’ve experienced, this is the first time I’ve felt the urge to write it all down—well, write as much of it as I can, anyway, in the mere 24 hours I have before I’ll leave this body and drop into another one.

 

No, this is not like the exorcist or the body snatchers, I’m not some kind of demon or alien possessing Dakota’s body. I am still Dakota, hence the sudden urge to write, but I am also a different entity entirely. A wandering soul, you might call me. And, today, Dakota has access to all of my memories, and I have access to hers. You could see it as a sort of partnership. I can’t force Dakota to do anything against her will, and honestly, most vessels I drop into don’t even recognize me as more than an odd feeling… which is another reason we are furiously writing this down. I’m thrilled that she can sense me so clearly and honored that she’s so interested in my life and will do my best to answer her questions.

 

Dakota: Who are you? Do you have a name?

 

Hmmm no… I don’t often get the chance to communicate with my vessels, so I guess I’ve never had a need for a name. I take on the name of the vessel I’m traveling in. Today, I am Dakota.

 

Dakota: Why are you here? What’s your mission… ok this is weird because we’re in one mind, so I get it, but I’m having a hard time putting your experience into words.

 

My mission is the same as the human mission, except it is much easier for me, and that is simply… to be.

 

To use a popular movie in this universion to simplify my existence, my life is like Groundhog Day, except I’m in a different body and a new universion every 24 hours. So, as of today, I’ve experienced 123,321 completely unique versions of September 11th, 2001 here on Earth. Infinity is hard for most of us to fathom, but even this many days, which amounts to over 300 years of your linear time, is so much more miniscule than our human mind can perceive. I wish I could share the experience of every day with you, but I don’t have the time to even think it all, and no reader would have the time to read it, so I’ll give you the highlight reel.

 

Dakota: What’s the most memorable universion you can share?

 

Universion 626, for sure.

 

The most beautiful moment I’ve ever experienced was on Miami beach, just after sunset. The waves lapped up onto the beach and sparkled pink as it hit the sand. As we walked along the saturated shoreline, the sand beneath our feet illuminated with every step we took, the neon pink glow spreading over our feet and up our ankles if the water had washed over them recently enough.

 

We’d swum out into the ocean after dark. Drawing messages to each other underwater, the plankton making it look like our fingers were magic wands.

 

After she’d drawn me a heart I grabbed her hand and pulled her to me. In many universions there is a lot of symbolism surrounding the way sparks and fireworks and light, in general, fly when you experience love… but this was the first universion where this manifested literally. Our kiss felt electric, and even with our eyes closed, the pink sparks shone through.

 

We were married for 11 years, but she told me just before I left, that she thought it was the best date we’d ever had.

 

Dakota: Wow, that’s so beautiful. The bioluminescent plankton here are bluish. Are there many variations like that in these alternate realities? The same but off just a bit in color or… anything else?

 

Oh yes, colors can vary greatly… sometimes they don’t exist at all.

 

Dakota: What do you mean? Were you inside of a blind person? That’s what it seems like… what is that? How can we explain that?

 

The memory you’re experiencing is of a universion where humans didn’t see with their eyes but with a sort of extra sensory perception. We are all made of light, Dakota, and the way we perceive of that light here is through color, but it’s possible to experience light in all sorts of ways.

 

Dakota: It’s like you’re… feeling… colors? That’s so weird, I-I can’t explain what you’re showing me.

 

Humans here aren’t built to perceive in this way, writing about it would most likely just confuse your readers.

 

Dakota: Yeah, you’re right. Have you ever told anyone else about your travels? Am I the only one?

 

Only once, in Universion 9,382. I was an 11-year-old girl named Sarah, camping out with my best friend Penny in her backyard.

 

“Aliens or ghosts?” Penny asked, holding up two books. The flashlight she held between her knees pointed straight up, making her look ghoulish: sunken, shadowed eye sockets and glowing red nostrils. The books were nothing but two rectangular silhouettes, but we’d read them enough that I knew their covers by heart. Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, with the creepy, drippy black artwork, and Alien Abductions with the typical grey alien with big, black pupilless eyes and a lightbulb-shaped head.

 

“Actually, I have a new story.” I said.

 

“You do?” Penny leaned forward, dropping her hands and placing the books on the tent floor. Only the skin beneath her chin was illuminated and a few statically charged wisps of highlighted hair, as her face plunged into darkness.

 

“Can you keep a secret?” I asked, and the oval shadow of her face bobbed up and down.

 

Dakota: Penny asked me… uh, I mean you if you ever wished you could stay?

 

Yes. I’d asked myself that same question countless times, but I stumbled with the sudden pressure to provide an honest answer. Maybe a few times I’d wanted to have more time, but the truth was that I get to live more presently than my vessels do; most of the people I drop in on have a plethora of problems and worries. Usually they are so wrapped up in their everyday patterns that they rarely notice the unique beauty of each new day, but I can’t avoid the… nowness of it all. I still feel their pain, but because it’s all new to me, I experience it differently. I’d hate to let life become so dull and my body so numb, which I suspect is what would happen if I spent too many days in any one body.

 

But what I finally said to Penny was, “No,” simply because she was still very much present, as most children are in her universion, and she wouldn’t have understood the adult human condition until she experienced it herself.

 

Though, in other 9/11s, there were several universions that appealed to me.

 

Dakota: Any particular one come to mind?

 

Yes. Universion 111,111. It was not that the memory of that September 11th was exciting or anything, it was actually quite a mundane day; a typical Saturday with my father in Central Park playing dominos.

 

It was the society that had developed within this universion that was so much better than most.

 

Can you imagine a unified Earth, Dakota? An entire planet without borders? Without a need for property or money? A place where unconditional love prevails and everything is shared? Without war? Without slavery?

 

Dakota: There’s no slavery in the US anymore.

 

Not of the human variety, well not legally. But billions of animals are enslaved, are they not?…

 

Can you imagine a planet of humans who love and share and support each other? Who live with the Earth rather than off of it. This was one universion I’d like to have stayed in.

 

Dakota: Can you change things? I mean, by communicating with me, by helping me write all this down… we’re changing things here already aren’t we?

 

Do you feel that I am forcing you write this down?

 

Dakota: No, but I feel an urge that couldn’t exist without your being here, without your inspirational knowledge. Are there more of you?

 

Yes and no. That’s a hard question to answer. I’ve never met anyone else like me, but since I travel alone, I wouldn’t know if I had met another observer. And that is the key phrase here. I observe. My vessels have complete free will. I cannot impose my desires on anyone I visit. And only those rare people like you, who are open to communication, ever know I’ve dropped in at all.

 

Dakota: Isn’t it scary not having any control? Has there ever been a universion you wished you could leave immediately?

 

There have been a few. Joining a vessel who is either experiencing or inflicting pain is not pleasant. But even the darkest days have had their slices of beauty.

 

Dakota: The silence is so peaceful, the space in between the drip, drip, drip. I look up from the pool of rippling red, where another drop of red is swelling at the tip of a transparently gray toe.

 

Drip.

 

Silence.

 

Drip.

 

Silence.

 

I follow the thin red line upwards. As my gaze moves up the pale leg, my eyes move faster, trying to take in the whole scene so as not to stare too long at any one gruesome detail.

 

A white hospital-gown-looking garment stained dark red at the center, splattering outwards, the speckles growing finer the further they reach.

 

Though her face is concealed by her drooping head, I know what it looks like.

 

Flashback: Blue, darting, terrified eyes.

 

Flashback: Red, full quivering lips. They contract into a chapped, wrinkled O. “No, no, no, no,” they plead.

 

Flashback: A hand… my hand? No, but it’s coming from my body, holds the girl’s head up by a fistful of her blonde hair, the other pushes a pistol to her gut.

 

Dakota: You killed her!

 

Yes.

 

Dakota: Wasn’t there any way you could stop it?

 

No.

 

Dakota: Do you choose the people you drop in on? Why would you want to feel what it’s like to-to murder someone?

 

Because it’s part of the human experience.

 

Dakota: Well it wasn’t part of my human experience… until you came along. I don’t know if I can handle any more memories like that.

 

Well it’s nearly time for me to move on anyway. Do you have any other questions?

 

Dakota: Yeah, what’s with the numbers I keep seeing? All those 1s…

 

I dropped in on a mathematician once. They were such a nerd for numbers. One of their favorite equations was 111 x 1,111 = 123,321, which, as I told you when I first arrived, is the number of days I’ve experienced here on Earth. 1… 2… 3… 3… 2… 1.

 

Dakota (September 12th, 2001):

 

I fell asleep quite suddenly… I don’t even remember going to bed. This all seems so much like a dream. But unless I was sleep writing yesterday, it wasn’t.

 

I slept all morning, and though I have a deadline for a book that’s due later this week, I just have to get this out while it’s fresh.

 

The nameless entity that weighed me down is now gone. I feel empty. It wasn’t the kind of weight that stress or grief dumps on you, though, it was an inspiring kind of weight. The weight of hundreds of years of memories in places that seem… simultaneously right next door and light years and light years away.

 

And if I didn’t have the pages from yesterday, I’d think it was all a dream. It still sort of feels like it may have been.

 

Their memories were so vivid to me… the way I wrote it for you is to simplify it… to make it understandable to you. But we weren’t having a conversation that was all in my head… it was all instant: fully formed sentences, stories, flashes of memories that I had to decipher.

 

Ugh, hold on, the phone’s ringing… it’s my editor, I have to take it. Hi Don, yeah, I’m working on it. New York?… what today? No, I still have too much to do… yeah I know it would be a great, opp-… ok, fine… when do I have to be there?

 

Sorry, I’ll have to cut this short… I have a last minute interview in the city today at CNN, apparently it’s a slow news day and I may not get another shot at this. Obviously my experience yesterday has me thinking irrationally if Don’s perception of reality is accurate… though I’m not sure if anyone’s perception of reality is accurate anymore.]

 

Oh my god… I thought I remembered everything. I thought—I thought I wrote every word consciously… but I just reread the entire text and at the end, I—I don’t remember writing this last sentence:

 

“They are all you.”

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

Dave Conrey, thank you for sharing your work with us today. I loved exploring this piece and I hope that all of you listening enjoyed the adventure it took me on too. If you want to find out more about Dave you can follow him on Instagram @daveconrey. There are links in the shownotes to that, Dave’s website, which is simply daveconrey.com, and a link to check out the cover art that sparked today’s story if you still haven’t download Podcast Addict, which is the best podcasting app out there to get the full experience of Art Ink.

 

So usually this is where I say goodbye to you, but I’m curious… what did you think of that? What if this was the way reality actually worked? Feel free to email me any thoughts.

 

You remember how I told you there were more layers to this story… well there is actually a lot of personal symbolism woven in there, but the biggest thing for me was that this entire story took place on 9/11.

 

Like anyone residing inside the US, and I’m sure many of you in other countries too, I remember exactly where I was when the horrible news started to spread. I was about an hour north of NYC. It was my junior year in a brand new high school, I knew nobody around me, I didn’t have a cell phone, I worried that my Dad, who was a travelling repairman, might be in the city, but I had no way of knowing. Several of the kids in my English class were hysterically crying. Nobody was working. There was talk of sending us all home, but that didn’t happen and it made me more mad, more afraid. I’ve never really trusted public authorities to take care of me… I wanted out. But I sat there in silence and terror until I could go home and discover that my Dad was safe.

 

I remember the days, weeks, and months after that day as a blur of American flags, bumper stickers, and window decals. Giant flags flapping over the entire length of pickup truck beds. The ubiquitous rear window flags that appeared on at least half of all the cars I saw on the road. Then the words I saw over and over and over again on my commutes: Never Forget 9/11.

 

I almost titled this story “Forgetting 9/11,” but I figured that without a proper explanation that’d probably turn a lot of people off. But it was very intentional that I refrained from writing about 9/11 as we know it. Why?

 

Well, I didn’t mention this back before I left for my Creative Sandbox Retreat, but I almost didn’t go because the day I had to fly from NYC to San Jose happened to fall on 9/11. It gave me mild anxiety all year long. But I told myself I was being ridiculous. The day I flew out I tried to see the bright side… I was through security in under 5 minutes. No one was in line in front of me; apparently I wasn’t the only one who was afraid of flying on the infamous day.

 

When I made it to the retreat center unscathed and I told Melissa that I almost decided not to come because of my silly superstition, she totally understood. But later, during our opening circle Melissa said something that turned this whole thing around for me. And unfortunately I can’t even say I’m paraphrasing because although I can remember her words bringing tears to my eyes, I can’t remember what she said; well that’s proof that that expression is true: people won’t always remember what you say or do, but they will always remember how you make them feel.

 

I know that she repeated my fears to the group and then she said that she was glad that I decided to come anyway. Basically, Melissa pointed out to me that I was reshaping 9/11, that I was no longer living in its shadow, that I was turning it into something good, instead.

 

For many months now I’ve been seeing repetitive 1s, I always happen to look at the clock at 11:11 and 1:11, but after I started drafting the idea for this story and I decided to set the story on 9/11, I started seeing 9:11 on clocks almost daily, too. I took that as a personal sign to keep on writing this story.

 

So I mean no disrespect when I say that I want to forget 9/11. I don’t mean that we should forget the loved ones who were lost. But I do mean that we shouldn’t let the shadow of that one day darken all of the 9/11s that are to come.

 

And that goes for any personal shadows you might have that you’re holding onto. There is one person in my family who grieves the loss of someone who’s been dead for nearly 50 years. Every year when the calendar page turns to reveal their loved one’s death date, they mourn like the person died yesterday. They plan to have a horrible day and they do.

 

I dunno, maybe I’m selfish, but I’d rather celebrate that I’m still lucky enough to be alive than ruin another precious day I have on Earth. I mean, I’m not always a fucking ray of sunshine, don’t get me wrong, I feel painful things, I still need to purge my anger and sadness and fear with a good cry every once in awhile. But then I do my very best to let it go. It takes practice and I’m not perfect at it. But I think, for me, it’s time to let 9/11 go.

 

Your potential is limitless, not just as an artist, but as a human being. Once you realize that the possibilities really are infinite, then you have the power to choose which possibility you want to live. Own it my friend. Own it.

 

PS – There’s a crazy special offer going on on Patreon right now. If you support me for just $1 per month you’ll get access to my Patron-only Art Library (high res downloads of all the fine art I’ve created over the past decade 300+ images!!!). You’ll also have a character in an upcoming episode of Art Ink named after you!

 

All Patrons also get access to any content I put out 2 days before anyone else as well as a copy of my exclusive audiobook (which is pretty much Art Ink before it was Art Ink, so it’s like getting 100 mini bonus episodes!).

 

Offer ends 12/21/19 or after the 1st 100 people sign up. Become a Patron on Patreon here to get instant access to all of these goodies.

 

 

Are you an artist with a story to tell?

We'd love to hear your story on the next episode of Art Ink. Check out our submission guidelines to find out how to make it happen.

Become an Insider to Get:

• new Art Ink episodes delivered straight to your inbox

• occasional tips and tricks for artists and storytellers

 

Help me follow my heart

 

For as little as $1 per month you'll get VIP early access to Art Ink episodes & special bonus gifts (like my Artsy Reflections audiobook) that you can't get anywhere else. Plus you'll be helping me make more free stuff - what could be better?

 

 

Did you know Patrons get access to my exclusive art library?

You can download high res, digital versions of every fine art photograph I've toiled over in the past decade, and use it however you like. Yup, really, it's true! There are over 600 images available right now and the gallery will just keep growing.

Art Ink – 12 – The Origin of Somewhere in the Middle – A Film by Writer, Producer, Director Nathan Ives

 

 

Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Nathan Ives

Title of Documentary: Somewhere in the Middle – Watch Somewhere in the Middle on Amazon

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MuleFilms/

 

 

Also mentioned in this episode:

 

Griffin House’s song: City River Lights

 

Movie: A Christmas in New York

 

Movie: The Basement

 

Singer-songwriter: Griffin House

 

Actor: Jasika Nicole

 

Guitar Player: Aaron Tap

 

Paper Sculptor: Jeff Nishinaka

 

Painter: Dan McCaw

 

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

Hello my friends, thank you for tuning into another episode of Art Ink. When I was still in the imagination phase of creating this podcast I had daydreams of featuring not just visual art, but also music and dance, knitting and embroidery, movies and books. I’ve been hustling so much to get each episode out on time it’s left me featuring artwork that’s limited to my small perspective. That’s not to say I don’t absolutely love the art and the artists I’ve selected so far, but what I am saying is that I’m just 1 person in a universe of what sometimes feels like infinite artists, and sometimes the only way for me to open up to a new creation is for YOU to reach out to me.

 

That’s why I’m thrilled today to introduce you to writer, director, and producer Nathan Ives whose latest film, “Somewhere in the Middle,” just released a few days ago. He was gracious enough to give us an insider’s look at how the film came to be, but before we dive into his story, let me give you a little taste of what it’s all about.

 

 

[Art Description:]

 

 

Somewhere in the Middle,” is a documentary that digs into the lives of 5 artists who you’ve probably never heard of, but have all made a legitimate career from their creative work. Two musicians, an actor, a painter, and a paper sculptor all share stories that illuminate what it’s really like to have a career in the arts. In a culture that sees artists as either superstars or starving, I found this to be a refreshing look at the reality of being a full-time artist.

 

With that, I’m going to narrate the story that Nathan sent in about what sparked his idea to create this film and a bit about the struggles he overcame to complete it.

 

[Story:]

 

River City Lights’ blew me away. The song is simple, beautiful, heart wrenching, and, to me, a perfect song. To this day I’m mesmerized when I listen to it or hear Griffin House play it live. For a few minutes I escape the craziness and drift into a melancholy oasis. There are a handful of songs in my life that have this effect on me, most I discovered in my teens, a few precious ones, more recently.

 

In 2016 I was directing ‘A Christmas In New York,’ and needed a song for the closing credits. I reached out to Griffin, having met him at a few of his shows, and he was gracious enough to write one for the film.

 

We developed what I would call a professional friendship. We’re not on one another’s Holiday card list, but when he’s in town, we’ll chat before or after his show about music, films, and getting by as an artist.

 

On one such occasion I made a comment about how impressed I was that he’d found a balance between staying true to his art and making a legitimate living. Griffin replied with one of his humble, sheepish grins, and a ‘thanks, man.’

 

Then he continued and said, ‘but you know, I was playing at The New York City Winery a few weeks ago, it was a sold out, like three hundred people or something. Really fun show. Afterwards this couple comes up to me, and this happens all the time, they said ‘we really love your music and we just know you’re going to make it someday!’

 

Griffin owns a house in Nashville and his music is the primary source of income for his family. He spends a couple of weeks on the road playing shows followed by a couple of weeks at home spending time with his family and working on new material. Sounds like a miserable life that no one would want to live… or, wait, does it sound like a life many people would dream of living?

 

Our conversation got me thinking about what it means to be a ‘successful’ artist. Over the next couple of months the question kept drifting into my psyche at traffic lights, in the shower, and other random places. Eventually it occurred to me that it was something I wanted to explore further.

 

Around that time, I had just completed a horror film, ‘The Basement,’ and my wife and I had our second child. I needed a project smaller in scope than a full feature film, that I could do in my free time, in and around changing diapers. At which point the seed of the idea for ‘Somewhere In The Middle’ was born.

 

I reached out to Griffin first, since the idea originated with him, and he agreed to be interviewed. One of my favorite people on this big planet was next, the actor, Jasika Nicole, who I had worked with previously on a film. My friend Paul is Matt Nathanson’s tour manager and recommended I interview Aaron Tap, Matt’s longtime guitar player. I was introduced to paper sculptor Jeff Nishinaka through the cinematographer I’ve worked with through the years, Ken Stipe, and Jeff, in turn, introduced me to the painter, Dan McCaw.

 

All five met my criteria of not being household names, but who made a legitimate living solely through their art.

 

There, I had my subjects. All that was left to do was to interview them all, write all of the moments and ideas I loved on index cards, lay the index cards on our dining room table, and stand over them, sipping a cup of Earl Gray tea, nibbling on cookies, until I figured out exactly what this film would be.

 

Once I had a general structure, it was off to sit for many hours in a dark room with the editor, Brady, and cut the pieces together. Once that was done and we had a rough cut of the film, I decided, without question, it was the worst thing, perhaps, that I had ever seen.

 

I then went home to my wife, talked about what a failure I was, and moped around the house like Eeyore for a few days. At first, she was sympathetic and did her best to console me, but given that she’d just given birth to a ten pound child, understandably, it didn’t last long.

 

A few days and ideas later, I went back in with Brady and we re-cut the film. It was much better, it suddenly felt again like a project that just might be worth finishing. As we began laying in the score from Pat O’Brien, it really started to come to life and I was beginning to think that this might actually be a film I’d be proud of.

 

From there, it was off to The Garrison, both my producing partner on the project and the post production facility. There we did the sound, color, and animated the titles. To be clear that’s the equivalent of saying, we just painted the house, put on the roof, and did the landscaping. It’s a lot of work and took about six weeks.

 

In the end, Somewhere In The Middle is a film I’m very proud of. What strikes me most about it is the honesty and vulnerability of the subjects. They really pull no punches and give us a window into their lives, the good, the bad, and the ugly. They are hard working, flawed, kind, extraordinarily talented human beings who, even though they may not be among the fortunate few who make it to superstar status, are redefining what it means to be a successful artist.

 

I hope the film will serve as an inspiration and education for those considering a career in the arts. For parents of a child considering such a path, I hope it offers a different perspective. For those who are working artists, I hope it offers that ‘thank God I’m not alone’ feeling.

 

There are moments in the film that will resonate with anyone in the arts, but many of those moments are as much about life as they are about art. I’ll leave you with the one from the seventy six year old painter, Dan McCaw, who said ‘In the end, we’re only what we’ve allowed ourselves to be.’

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

So, another reason I found “Somewhere in the Middle,” such a refreshing film is that, until now, podcasts were my only source of insight into the world of full-time artists. The mass media rarely cover anyone who isn’t already a household name, and I don’t think there’s a movie out there that doesn’t regurgitate either the rags to riches cliché and/or the starving artist stereotype. A new story is long overdue, and I’m so glad that Nathan is helping to tell it.

 

Despite how much I learned from these career creatives, I actually resonate with Nathan’s story, the part that I had to dig a little deeper to pull out of him, after he submitted his story. And because I think many of you will resonate with this too, I’m going to share.

 

As I let you know in the last episode I’m back to temporarily working a day job to pay off some of the debt I racked up in my yearlong journey of jumping into voiceover and to fund a new soundproof booth so I don’t have the urge murder my neighbors when they want to mow their lawns. Am I a failure because I decided to make some regular income from a job that’s not quite as satisfying… sometimes I think so, honestly, but I know that’s a culturally programmed mindset. And despite my intention to turn off the audiobook and voice over work since June, the jobs haven’t stopped coming, so for creating a mindset of success for myself, that’s been really validating. So really success is so very personal. Some artists want the paparazzi, to me that would be an absolute nightmare, I just want to be able to control my own schedule and work in yoga pants.

 

This is Nathan’s 4th film according to IMDB, his 5th if you count another movie I came across, that, for some reason, is not linked up there. Maybe there are even more I don’t know about. But the point is he worked with Vivica A. Fox on his very first movie, and he worked for 3 years completely off of his creative work. When I asked him about the experience of his own career via email Nathan wrote:

 

“Currently, my wife and I own a boat salvage yard that I manage and she has a good job in healthcare. Luckily, we have very good employees and the boat business only takes a few hours a day of my time. The rest I can focus on film work. 

 

The best things about my time as an independent artist were the flexibility and working on the creative elements full time. When I wasn’t shooting, I was down at my favorite coffee shop writing or prepping for upcoming projects – that was fun. The worst things, by far, were the inconsistency of work (and pay) and taking a lot of jobs I really didn’t want to do, just for the money. I’m much happier now, balancing my time between a business that I also love (boats), that is much more consistent, and film. These days, the film work I do, goes towards the kid’s college funds or a remodel on the house.”

 

I’m so happy he shared that with me, because it just goes to show you that an artist’s idea of what success is, is as nuanced as the people behind the art.

 

I know that many of you listening today are artists, and if you resonate with the idea of helping to shatter the starving artist paradigm there’s something you can do to help:

 

Please watch “Somewhere in the Middle” on Amazon and leave an honest review. Your reviews will go a long way in making sure this movie will be seen by as many people as possible. I’ll have a link in the shownotes that’ll take you right there.

 

Thanks in advance for your support! Ok, my friends, that’s all you’re going to hear from me today, but before I go, I wanted to let you know to stick around for just another minute if you want to hear a little teaser from the movie. Ok, I’m signing off, but as usual, I’ll be back with more in a couple of weeks.

Are you an artist with a story to tell?

We'd love to hear your story on the next episode of Art Ink. Check out our submission guidelines to find out how to make it happen.

Become an Insider to Get:

• new Art Ink episodes delivered straight to your inbox

• occasional tips and tricks for artists and storytellers

 

Help me follow my heart

 

For as little as $1 per month you'll get VIP early access to Art Ink episodes & special bonus gifts (like my Artsy Reflections audiobook) that you can't get anywhere else. Plus you'll be helping me make more free stuff - what could be better?

 

 

Did you know Patrons get access to my exclusive art library?

You can download high res, digital versions of every fine art photograph I've toiled over in the past decade, and use it however you like. Yup, really, it's true! There are over 600 images available right now and the gallery will just keep growing.

Art Ink – 11 – Diptych in Love – A Short Story Inspired by Dorothy Siemens’ Art

 

Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Dorothy Siemens

Title of Art: Wonder-Rapture

Artist’s Website: https://dorothysiemens.com/

Instagram: @dorothy.siemens

 

Dorothy’s Lyrical Language series

 

Support Rebekah on Patreon if you want more episodes! https://www.patreon.com/rebekahnemethy

 

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

Hello my friends! Thank you for tuning in to a new episode of Art Ink!

 

I’m late with this episode, and I’m consciously preventing myself from pulling out the S-word. But I feel I owe you an explanation, nevertheless. I do this weird thing I’ve noticed that’s kind of a pattern for me: I seem to procrastinate on the things I want to do most, by unintentionally overcommitting myself. I also do this other thing that I’m afraid many of us in capitalistic societies do, and that is I makes choices based on money. It pains me to admit that, because I’ve spend a lot of time promising myself I will let my heart weigh in more heavily than my mind over the past few years, but unfortunately my head and my wallet still has an equal vote in my decisions.

 

At the end of a long texting vent with my BFF last week I apologized for complaining to her typing, I hope you’re not rolling your eyes at me, you’re probably even busier than that (she has two kids on totally different schedules, a job, and is going to school full time too), and I know I do this to myself. She replied, I’m not rolling my eyes, it’s like you have four jobs!

 

Even though I was aware that I have far too much to juggle right now, it hadn’t quite struck me until she did the math for me. Oh my god, I thought, I do have four jobs. And in order to prioritize this podcast, I just recently had to resign from some volunteer work I’ve been doing over the past 6 months. Yikes… so I actually had five jobs?

 

I didn’t wake up one day and say I’m going to use up every spare second of time I have every week… but back in March, when I had only 1 job I did reach out to a couple of animal organizations that I love. One of them was looking for volunteers and the other was looking for part-time seasonal help. And I ended up getting involved with both of them. So that was my new commitment for Saturday and Sunday.

 

Then, in June, a friend from my former photography job offered me a contract my logical side couldn’t resist, good money for working only 3 days per week for the next 6 months. After a happy but stressful year of totally freelancing doing audiobooks and voiceover, I thought it’d be nice to have a bit of consistent work so that I could focus on, guess what?, this podcast in my free time (which, at this point, was the remaining 2 days per week).

 

So I stopped auditioning for audiobooks and I went out of office on my Fiverr account… but the thing is, the audiobooks didn’t stop coming. Authors I didn’t even know were finding my samples on Audible, other clients I’d done a couple of jobs for were consistently sending me more work, and the stash of stories I had queued up for Art Ink rapidly started to dwindle as I hustled more and more.

 

Luckily, I only have 2 more months left on my contract at the photography job, and the busy season at the animal sanctuary will also be wrapping up around the same time, so that should free up some time.

 

I have soooo many great ideas for the future of this show. Not just story ideas, and lists and lists of artists that I want to feature, but also lists of ideas about teaching storytelling to creatives of all kinds, and reaching out to authors and writers willing to help create more content, AND ideas for special episodes. But, this all takes time. Time, time, time. Despite my inability to do simple math to count how many jobs I’ve signed up for, I’m kind of a nerd when it comes to project tracking. I track the time spent on all of my audiobook projects and, although I’ve been a bit lax about tracking every little bit of my time spent on Art Ink, I can tell you that the time I have tracked clocks in at 144 hours… so that’s about 10 hours per episode. And, like I said, there have been some days when I didn’t track my time. Like the entire 5 days I spent at my recent creativity retreat. I had no internet there, so I didn’t bother trying to use the web-based tool I normally use.

 

So why am I telling you all of this? Well, I want to let you in on a little secret, and it’s a super scary secret to share, because of this silly superstition I have that wishes revealed don’t come true. I actually have this daydream quite often… I imagine Art Ink being a daily podcast. I imagine it being the thing I work on full time. I imagine an inbox full of submissions from other artists with the story bug, and emails from listeners that say they discovered a new artist, or even more amazing, artists who say listeners found and bought their art after listening to a story here.

 

The truth about podcasting is that it is a labor of love. Independent podcasters podcast because they WANT to do it, not because it’s a quick and easy way to fame and fortune, which is actually a quite comical misconception among newbie podcasters. I am paying for this podcast to go out into the world, in money AND in time. I do have a few loyal Patrons whose kind donations pay for the monthly hosting fees for this podcast, but aside from that, the only payment I’m getting is the satisfaction of doing it. And, unfortunately, that does limit how much I can do when I have to decide between paying my mortgage on time or putting out my podcast on time. Ugh. I hate capitalism. #1stworldproblems right?

 

But if you’re enjoying this show and you want more episodes I have great news, because you can always pledge your support at patreon.com/rebekahnemethy. With your help I might be able to more easily choose my heart over my head and maybe even get these episodes out on time! And you’ll also get a bunch of bonuses that you can only find on Patreon, like getting access to the show 2 days early, a copy of my Artsy Reflections audiobook, and a blooper reel that’s guaranteed to crack you up.

 

Ok, with that said, let’s get ready to dig into today’s story! Today’s featured artist is one of my favorite artists, and today’s cover art is, unfortunately, not for sale because I beat you to it! Haha.

 

I met Dorothy Siemens several years ago in an online art marketing course, and I’ve been hooked on her work ever since! The way her art is filled with layer upon layer of color and texture makes me swoon so much so that, many times, I’ve been shocked to discover that I’m looking at the progress photo of a half done, or even just begun, painting.

 

Dorothy mostly works in oil and cold wax with oil sticks, but she’s not afraid to experiment and often slips in other mediums and materials. Gold leaf is a recurring element in many of her pieces, and I’ve seen her beautifully incorporate collage into her paintings as well. Flowers, birds, and plant life (both real and imagined) are recurring themes in Dorothy’s work, and she’s brilliant at painting patterns that give this viewer an instant sense of relaxation. But Dorothy can also dazzle me when she dips into the realm of the abstract.

 

Wonder-Rapture, the piece that sparked today’s story, is actually one of Dorothy’s more abstract paintings, so let me repaint it into your imagination until you get a chance to check it out yourself.

 

[Art Description:]

 

So, Wonder-Rapture is a diptych made up of two square panels. The panel on the left is primarily blue, and the one on the right is pink. The tops of both panels have, what looks to me, like gold clouds. On the bottom of them both are many different words blending into each other and the backgrounds in various shades of blue, pink, and gold. The most prominent word on the blue panel is “wonder,” and on the pink panel the word that stands out the most, if you haven’t already guessed, “rapture.” The element that connects the two pieces is a thick calligraphic white line that loops across the horizon along bottom third.

 

The truth is, when I first saw these paintings I fell in love… and I was absolutely convinced, when I recalled them later on, that the script actually said, “love.” I was wrong, though the white line seems like writing at a glance, it’s an abstract style known as “asemic writing,” which intentionally leaves the words open to interpretation or, in my case, imagination.

 

I call this work of fiction, Diptych in Love… enjoy.

 

[Story:]

 

 

Lila

 

She was running as fast as she could, as far as she could, but she didn’t know why she was running or who she was running from. No matter. Astrid had been 100% right thus far and so when Lila saw the words, “RUN AWAY NOW!” she didn’t hesitate.

 

Her burning thighs wouldn’t take her any further, though, so after a quick glance over her shoulder to reassure herself the street behind her was empty, she slowed then stopped; panted with her head between her knees.

 

Lila didn’t know how far she’d run, but it felt like miles. She took in her surroundings, then crept into the shadow of a large oak tree in the darkest nearby yard and squatted next to it as her breathing slowed to its regular rhythm. The moon was just a sliver in the sky, but a surprising number of houses still sent beams of yellow-orange light into the street.

 

A car slowly washed out the warm tinted light with large, bright white high beams.

 

Lila held her breath.

 

The white cones continued past though, and Lila sighed as the darkness enveloped her surroundings once again, seemingly darker now.

 

The white, bold letters flashed in her mind once again, “RUN AWAY NOW!” and Lila relived the feeling of the energy Astrid had sent along with that cryptic message. It was like an invisible oxygen-draining wave had washed over her body, amplifying the white noise in her ears and sending goosebumps rippling down her skin as it rushed past. Fear.

 

It was one of many messages that only she had ever been able to see. Lila’s body sagged with the thought; with the way it isolated her. Who would ever believe her if she needed to find help? What if Astrid needed help?

 

Lila laughed out loud before she could stop herself; threw her hand over her mouth, peered around with wide eyes that were, once again, adjusting to the dim light.

 

Still alone. Still safe.

 

The thing was, though, Astrid was a painting, well two paintings that went together. A diptych, they called it, Lila had come to find out. Laughing at herself seemed to make it ok, though, as if the laughter negated the fact that she had named a painting; negated any feelings Lila might have developed for Astrid.

 

She found herself reminiscing about the day she pulled back the dusty afghan to reveal the two canvases. She was rummaging through her late grandmother’s attic, moving onto another pile of long-forgotten boxes, and there they were, leaned up against the cardboard like a pair of tipped dominoes.

 

Lila could still remember the feeling in her stomach when she first set eyes on them. She’d gasped at the beauty, and it was as if she’d swallowed the dust swirling through the late afternoon sunbeams and they’d magically transformed into butterflies frolicking deep in her belly.

 

She slid the paintings apart to find that the white flowy script connected them to one another. The word love swept across the two canvases, making them one. The first square panel was blue with a gold cloud floating at the top. The second canvas was pink with a golden cloud. Both paintings had various words scribbled beneath the main lettering, various shades of blue, gold, and pink blended them in and out of the background.

 

Lila remembered this moment so vividly, taking in every detail of the artwork, standing there, enraptured, until the dust settled and the slivers of sun disappeared one by one. She knew what she had seen.

 

Yet later that night, when Lila was hanging the paintings, things had changed.

 

“Pretty paintings,” Naomi had said from behind her, “I never saw that at your grandma’s house.”

 

“Me neither, it was up in the attic,” Lila said, “I figured a little more love couldn’t hurt?”

 

“What do you mean?” Naomi asked.

 

“Ah… isn’t it pretty obvious,” Lila collected her hammer and level; was closing the box of nails.

 

“Well, I’m no art critic, but it looks pretty abstract to me… but if you get a love vibe from it, I’m not going to argue with you.”

 

Lila spun around, arms full of tools, “what is there to interpret?” she laughed. “It clearly says…” but as she looked up Lila trailed off, because the word wasn’t there anymore. “That’s strange… I could’ve sworn it said love.”

 

“That first loop kinda looks like an L,” Naomi said, “and I guess that could be an E at the end, but that’s as far as I can take it.”

 

She was right… the white script was nothing but a thick, looping line… not a word at all.

 

How could I have misread that? Lila thought. How could I have ‘read’ it in the first place?

 

“That’s ok, it’s still pretty,” Naomi said, and she pecked Lila on the cheek before she left the room.

 

A bit dumbfounded, Lila watched as Naomi walked away. She turned back to the painting. Stared at it. She was sure the duo had said love.

 

After a moment Lila shook her head silently to herself and headed to the garage to unload her tools. As she’d returned to the living room, however, she looked up at the wall and stopped short. The thick white line that stretched across the canvas now said something else: “Company’s Coming,” it read, and in the next second a knock startled Lila out of her disbelief.

 

“What the fuck?” she whispered to herself.

 

Lila cautiously peered through the peephole, and sighed out her held breath when she recognized Mrs. Jones’ smiling green eyes peering over a mountainous plate of assorted cookies. “What’s all this Mrs. Jones?” Lila said pulling the door open.

 

“Oh we had leftovers from my granddaughter’s bake sale, and I thought I’d share the wealth. You know my metabolism isn’t what it used to be,” she said pushing the cookies through the doorway.

 

“That’s so kind of you, Mrs. Jones, thank you,” Lila said, “do you want to come in for-”

 

“No, no dear,” she was already walking away, “I”ve already gorged myself enough for one day, gotta burn off some these calories before the sun goes down.”

 

“Well thanks again,” Lila said, and Mrs. Jones threw a hand over her shoulder in a half wave as she speed walked across the yard.

 

By the time Lila got the cookies to the coffee table, the painting had returned back to its abstractly wordless state.

 

The next time Astrid had morphed to message Lila it had been with a single word: “Rain.”

 

“Look at that!” Lila had exclaimed.

 

“What?!” Naomi said, startled, but when she followed Lila’s gaze to the art on the wall her expression remained unchanged.

 

“The painting.”

 

“What about it?” she looked again.

 

“Nothing, I thought I saw a bug.” Lila lied.

 

And Naomi went back to her book.

 

Lila had gone out shopping sometime after that. When she headed inside the sky was blue and cloudless, just as it was when she stepped back out into the sunshine an hour later, but there was steam rising from the parking lot pavement now, which was also a shade darker than it had been before.

 

It was summertime standard practice for Lila to leave her windows open a crack… rain was extremely rare in this part of California, especially this time of year. But she hadn’t considered the painting’s prediction; had tried to put it out of her head.

 

Her soggy seat didn’t let her forget it for the rest of the ride home, though.

 

How funny that her butt was wet now too, Lila thought, coming back to her present predicament. She clutched her knees to her chest. At least it was a warm wet spot, which was, honestly, one of the main reasons she’d been able to sit there in the dark, in a stranger’s front yard for christsakes, for so long reminiscing. But if she was completely honest, she’d also have to admit that she was too scared to go back.

 

At least Naomi wasn’t home… she was safe… but what about Astrid? Oh, why didn’t I think to grab my phone? Lila thought.

 

“Love.” It was a flash of calligraphy in Lila’s mind accompanied by that fluttery feeling she’d come to expect. It was immediately followed by a wave of shame, then a splattering of confusion.

 

Lila had tried to tell Naomi about Astrid’s messages, but she just didn’t see them. Though Lila had conveniently omitted the numerous times Astrid had sent her “Love.”

 

Lila didn’t know if she should feel grateful, or guilty, or just plain crazy. It seemed silly to admit she might be in love with a painting, but clearly Astrid loved her, otherwise why would she try to protect her? And what was she protecting her from?

 

Eventually she found the bravery to creep back home. She reached the edge of the property much quicker than expected… all that running had seemed to take so long. It was as if she’d watched a movie in slow motion to make it last, but once it was over only 5 minutes had passed.

 

It felt odd to be sneaking around her own house. She was crouching behind a bush, peeking through branches when a nearby vehicle suddenly growled to life. Headlights illuminated the street as a dark-colored van raced away from the front of her house.

 

Lila snuck around the perimeter, checking the darkness for intruders. Assured that she was alone, at least outside, she turned her attention to the house. There were more lights on inside than there should’ve been, so she crept around a second time peeking in the windows as she went. When she finally made her way to the front door she found it was cracked open, the wood splintered near the knob.

 

She pushed the door slowly… tensing as a screechy squeak tore open the silence. When Lila finally got up the nerve to step fully into the room, the fear she’d felt just before she’d fled returned full force, static erupted in her ears and pulsed louder with each thundering thud of her heart. Astrid was gone.

 

 

Naomi

 

“Uhhh, why is your ass all wet?” Naomi asked, grinning, “Did you have an accident?”

 

Lila didn’t exactly slam her keys on the countertop, but she didn’t put them down gently either. She dropped the shopping bag to the floor and spun around. “It rained,” she said, all business, “no, actually it poured.”

 

“I’m sorry?”

 

“Naomi, we live in California and it’s July.” She stared at her wife hard.

 

Naomi finally raised an eyebrow in response.

 

Lila sighed. “You know earlier, when I asked you to look at the painting?”

“Yeah…”

 

“The painting… it-it’s been sending me messages. The white line changes into legible words sometimes, and… when it happened earlier I was trying to get you to see it,” Lila sighed again, “but it’s obvious you didn’t.” She looked at the ground.

 

“See what?” Naomi was suddenly in front of her, two hands gently gripping Lila’s shoulders. She moved one hand to Lila’s chin and tipped it upwards, “What didn’t I see?”

 

“It said, ‘rain,” Naomi, and that’s not the first time it’s predicted the future. It knew when Mrs. Jones was coming over, too.”

 

Naomi didn’t say anything. She didn’t want to lie, but she didn’t want to be overeager with her knowledge either. The truth was Naomi had gotten some of her own messages… she hadn’t seen the one about the rain earlier, though, and that news made her wary. It made her want to keep her art criticisms to herself.

 

“You don’t believe me, do you?” Lila interrupted Naomi’s thoughts.

 

“Of course, I do.” She said, and pulled Lila in for a hug. It may have seemed like Naomi was reassuring her wife, but she was just as much trying to comfort herself.

 

It wasn’t just the weird premonitions though, it was the angry, vindictive vibes Naomi felt sometimes… especially when she was close to Lila, like now, she felt it now.

 

Naomi glanced into the living room. Her eyes darted around the room, but avoided the wall. She wanted to disprove herself. Just a quick look to see that the paintings were exactly as- but they weren’t. The once graceful flourish that linked the two squares was now drippy and jagged, “Bloody Nomi,” it said.

 

“What’s wrong?” Lila asked, pulling back.

 

Naomi must have flinched or squeezed her too hard or… something. She wasn’t sure. She tried to look anywhere but at the sinister art, but Lila had already caught her gaze and spun around to see.

 

Luckily, however, as Naomi had expected, they were receiving private messages. She did her best to calm her face, to act normal, to pretend literally anything else was happening.

 

“So… salads?” Naomi forced a smile, “Is that what we decided for tonight?” She didn’t wait for an answer, though, and began pulling vegetables out of the fridge. She rolled a barely ripe tomato into the center of a cutting board and grabbed her chef knife. On the very first slice, though, Naomi’s knife slipped across the fruit’s firm, smooth surface and slid into the meaty flesh of her thumb.

 

The knife was just recently sharpened, and so it took a few seconds for Naomi to register the pain, clean and quick as that slice was. Well, quick anyway, definitely not clean. Bloody was a euphemism, Naomi thought, bitterly. She managed to avoid looking at the living room wall on their way out to the car.

 

Six stitches later Lila and Naomi were back home, sipping on gin and tonics, and still regretting (and digesting) their vending machine dinner from hours earlier. The alcohol was making it a little easier for her to ignore the foreshadowing twins… but not for long.

 

“So, I’ve been doing some research,” Lila brought her laptop with her as she sat herself on the arm of Naomi’s recliner. “This kind of abstract art, lines that look like writing but actually aren’t, is called asemic writing.” She twisted the screen towards Naomi, “Isn’t that interesting?”

 

“Sure,” Naomi said, and looked over the Google Image results for just enough time to act like she gave a shit. “Cool,” she concluded, turning her gaze back to her book.

 

“So, I was thinking maybe we should name her!”

 

“Name who?”

 

“The painting.”

 

“Her?”

 

“Yeah… what about Astrid?”

 

“Astrid? Why Astrid?”

 

“I dunno,” Lila giggled, “I couldn’t think of any other name that began with AS.”

 

“What about Ashley?”

 

“Too young and dumb sounding. Astrid sounds wise… elegant… don’t you think?”

 

“Sure, baby, Astrid’s a great name.” And Naomi faked her second smile of the evening. It didn’t feel good. She wasn’t proud of it, but she hadn’t told Lila about the message she’d seen right before she cut herself. Maybe she could trick this Asshole, Astrid, into believing she didn’t see her messages.

 

Naomi wasn’t sure if the painting was predicting the future or creating it, but either way, she needed to find out.

 

Lila was oogling the Ass art. Seriously, it was disgusting… like watching a gaggle of girls swoon over the Fonz for absolutely. no. reason. Naomi couldn’t help but follow Lila’s gaze to the wall, and what she saw turned her stomach.

 

“Love,” it said. Like the first time Lila had seen it.

 

Naomi realized that this was another first; this was the first time the painting was letting them both read the same message. It was toying with her. Making her watch as Lila was lured to it.

 

Then, the word “Love,” began to fade to gray and rippled until new words began to form. The words appeared in a bouncy yet elegant script: “Lila Loves Astrid.”

 

 

Astrid

 

The rain drummed on the van’s rooftop; fat, wet drops that echoed through the cavernous, tinny space. It was like the world was sobbing for her, because, of course, Astrid couldn’t cry herself. She wondered if it might offer her some relief if she could. Probably not, she decided.

 

She had no idea where she was going, and she had absolutely no interest in finding out. She was already leaving the one place in the world where she’d wanted to be. That’s all she needed to know.

 

Astrid had always had such strength and control over her thoughts. Not now, though. Now her visions were chaotic; bipolar. Flashes of the fear on Lila’s face kept returning. The panic that Astrid herself had caused. She hadn’t wanted to hurt her, hadn’t wanted to leave, but for Lila’s own safety it was the only option.

 

Astrid forced her thoughts back to her favorite memory: Lila’s wondrous brown eyes scanning every inch of her that day in the attic; the sparkling dust making her shimmer like some kind of magickal princess. It was truly love at first sight. What Lila didn’t know, though, was that Astrid had been seeing that moment for decades. To feel what she’d hoped to be true for so long in that instant was enrapturing: Lila loved her back.

 

Astrid hadn’t known she was already taken, though. How could she have known? Not that it would have mattered… the heart wants what it wants; feels what it feels; loves who it loves. And Astrid’s heart chose Lila.

 

And Naomi had used that against her. Used love as a weapon.

 

Astrid was conscious, precognitive, hell, you might even call her magickal… but she was not all-knowing. She’d suspected Naomi had been lying, but if there was even a slight chance that Lila could’ve been hurt… well that’s why Astrid had told her to run away.

 

Light stretched across the white interior in amoebic patterned trapezoids. A piece of bare metal flashed, reminded Astrid of the glint of the knife Naomi held, the reflection in her crazed eyes. “Either she goes… or you do,” she’d said, “if I have to lose her, it won’t be to you.”

 

Lila hadn’t known Naomi was just around the corner, crouching in the dark, when she got home. There was no time to explain, no time to say goodbye.

 

Again, Lila’s panicked expression appeared in vivid detail; impossible to push away.

 

After Lila took off, Naomi had gotten to work. She shoved the couch askew and twisted the coffee table. She thrust her elbow into the wall, leaving a divot that sprinkled crumbled sheetrock to the floor.

 

She left the room briefly, but after a bit of metallic shuffling from the garage, returned with a crowbar. She passed through the living room and headed out the front door. Astrid heard the dead bolt engage. Seconds later though, there was a thump, and the sound of splintering wood as Naomi pried her way back through.

 

Once Naomi had returned the crowbar she stomped back into the living room and pulled Astrid off of the walls, one hand gripping each panel. She roughly stacked Astrid’s pieces together and shoved her into an industrial sized garbage bag. And then, for Astrid, everything had gone black.

 

They were in the car for a while after that. Maybe an hour? And then suddenly there was a deep, muffled voice mixing with Naomi’s. Astrid felt herself being lifted, swinging through the air, and then gripped by large hands that pressed into the wrinkled plastic.

 

Car doors opened, closed. The sound of Naomi’s car faded away and Astrid felt the open air above her as the loud garbage bag was shimmied down her sides.

 

The smile that spread across the man’s face showed recognition, but Astrid didn’t have a clue who he was. She remained abstract, wary of showing her ability to a stranger.

 

He gently leaned her against the wall of his van and strapped her securely in place. And that’s where she’d been, watching the sickly looking light leak through the rain covered windows, and filled with a strange sense of regret for letting Lila live… for she knew now that death was probably kinder than Naomi.

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

Thank you my friends for listening, and thank you Dorothy for sharing Wonder-Rapture with all of us.

 

Please check out the cover art when you can, and click through to the show notes to visit Dorothy’s website and follow her on Instagram. If you visit dorothysiemens.com you can find all of the current work she has for sale, which includes an entire series titled “Lyrical Language,” just in case you’re interested in seeing more paintings similar to today’s featured art. You can find Dorothy on Instagram @dorothy.siemens, and her most recent work is absolutely breathtaking. She been painting in purple and teal pallets the most beautiful little impressionistic landscapes and moonscapes… if you like Monet, you don’t want to miss out on Dorothy’s latest posts.

 

Seriously, go, right now… alright, my friends, that’s all for today. But make sure you’re subscribed to join me on our next art-inspired adventure.

 

Ciao!

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Art Ink – 10 – Sandstorm at Sea

Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Me (Rebekah Nemethy)

Title of Art: Sandstorm at Sea

Artist’s Website: rebekahnemethy.com

Instagram: @rebekahnemethy

 

Melissa Dinwiddie’s book The Creative Sandbox Way (check out the first 50 pages for free!)

 

Support Art Ink on Patreon to get goodies: rebekahnemethy.com/patreon

 

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

Welcome back to a brand new episode of Art Ink! I feel a bit like I’m cheating this week… because despite my best efforts to sit down and write something new over the past couple of weeks, I’ve barely had time to sleep let alone get into a creative or productive groove. I have a bad habit of putting too much on my plate… I’m working on it.

 

But!…

 

The good news is that it’s nearly my favorite time of the year: Creative Sandbox Retreat time! As you’re listening to this, I’m packing my bags with comfy clothes, blank notebooks, and maybe even my camera, to head to California, where Melissa Dinwiddie hosts her annual creative retreat about an hour south of San Jose. This is either my 4th or 5th year returning… I honestly lost count hahaha. Time just slips out of my grasp when I’m there, I’m afraid to admit it, but I’ll be on my way home before I can blink I’m sure.

 

So why is that good news for you? Well it’s my intention to crank out some stories while I’m there. As many as I can manage in the 5 days I have.

 

Today’s story is from my own blog archive, which, I realized gives me the opportunity to fill you in on more Art Ink history, because what you may not know is that this show is an expanded audio version of what I was already doing on my own blog for my own art a few years ago. And I actually have to thank Melissa for that original blog concept too, because if it weren’t for her “Tiny and Daily” teachings (which you can find out more about in her book The Creative Sandbox Way), well, if it weren’t for the “Tiny and Daily” concept, I don’t think I ever would’ve started the Photo and 100 Words Project.

 

I needed a way to regularly get my art out into the world that wasn’t too overwhelming. Writing 100 words wasn’t a huge deal… but the idea of doing it daily was still a bit scary for me, especially because I was creating art AND writing a complimentary story to go with it. (sounds familiar huh?) So I decided to go with tiny and weekly instead: one photo and one short story of less than 100 words. It was 2014 when I started blogging weekly, writing mostly narrative nonfiction with a poem sprinkled in here and there, and I kept that up for well over a year.

 

Even back then I wanted to get other artists involved, though. In fact, I started an Instagram account for the Photo and 100 words project, too, though I never actually posted to that account.

 

A few years into it, around the time my new-found fascination with capturing tiny reflections spurred an abstract series of photos on the blog, my stories started to stretch past the 100-word mark, and the Photo and 100 Words Project evolved into Artsy Reflections.

 

By the time my blog trickled out to a standstill, I knew I wanted to give my stories an actual voice in the podcast medium, but it was too scary to put the whole focus on my own art and personal stories… it just seemed too selfish. But the spark for Art Ink was there… and if you listened to the very first episode of this show, you already know that story.

 

So today’s featured photo came from my Reflection series… let me recreate it in your brain before we move on:

 

[Art Description:]

 

If you squint at this abstract photo, it could pass for a yellowed map. It’s mostly blue and reddish-brown, with slashes of coppery gold hovering above and blending into the rest of the piece.

 

Imagine you’re on a boat in a Caribbean sea, approaching a red-brown desert island as you sail between two tan sand bars. Now imagine you’re in the middle of a sandstorm. Wet clumps of sand cling to your eyelashes, creating coppery vertical haloes as your watery eyes squint against the wind, distorting the scene ahead of you.

 

Sandstorm at Sea is what I call this photograph, and it’s this same title that sparked the following memory…

 

[Story:]

 

What are you more afraid of: a stranger’s opinion of you or death? The answer might not be as obvious as you think…

 

It was day three of our seaside vacation and we were just hitting the beach for the first time. By some miracle, the sun was peeking out from behind the clouds; despite the 10-day forecast that showed nothing but dark clouds and plentiful rain.

 

I had been under the covered balcony, starring out at the ocean, when it finally happened, and I wasted no time in trading my pjs for a tankini and digging my toes into the sand. Okay… I did make everyone pose for photos first, you should just assume that’s a given.

 

The waves were pounding the shore and most of the boys didn’t hesitate to jump in. I wandered along the wet shoreline feeling the warm water sweep over my feet. They were calling for me to come in, but I wasn’t so sure I could handle the stormy seas. I can swim, but I’m far from a mermaid.

 

It took a lot of convincing and a bit of daring me to get me to walk out any further. My boyfriend at the time insisted that he would protect me, and I only had to get past where the waves broke and into the safety of his arms.

 

Cautiously, I ventured deeper into the ocean. I was knee deep one second, but then, suddenly, white water was washing over my entire body and I found myself butt down back on the beach.

 

You’d think that my fear would give me some instinct to brace myself, I mean, I must have braced myself, but I had no idea how powerful those waves were.

 

I went back to wandering in the safe zone for a while. I don’t know exactly how long it was before I noticed… but I’d been strutting my stuff in front of strangers for more than a few minutes, when I finally brushed my hands over my butt to find a heaping pile of sand that had been scooped into my bathing suit bottom as I’d been pushed up the beach.

 

I rushed back into the ocean, instinctively, to rinse my bottom out. Apparently, the fear of people seeing me in something that resembled a saggy diaper, and the connotations that came with that, were much more threatening than drowning.

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

Yup, that’s the true story of one of my first and, understandably, last experiences at the beach. Shout out to the power of the ocean to help me face my fear of public embarrassment AND my fear of being pummeled into a pulp all in one day. Hmmm… maybe I should visit the shore more often.

 

Well I do love the ocean, the sound of waves, the feel of the soft sand on bare feet, and the salty wind whipping inland… it’s all so magical, isn’t it? That must’ve been why I was distracted for so long. I’m giggling even now imagining the scene from a strangers point of view: look at the smile on that girl’s face, she seems intoxicated by sunshine… or perhaps self-satisfied? Oh, wow, yeah, probably self satisfied, because it looks like she just relieved herself… took a dump right in her bathing suit!

 

Ok, I know I’m letting my imagination get away with me… but I hope that gave you a laugh. My embarrassment is your entertainment.

 

And if you’re antsy for more entertainment you don’t actually have to wait two weeks. I’ve been hesitant to put this out there because I didn’t want it to seem like Art Ink has this ulterior motive… but the fact is that I’ve actually been on Patreon sharing my work since 2014, and before I go any further I have to send out my heartfelt gratitude to Yadira, Alice, and Margie for being my longest running supporters. Yadira and Alice have been there from the very beginning which means they’ve given me a whopping 55 months of support! And Margie has been supporting me for 44 months! Thank you ladies for always believing in the work I put out into the world, whether that means my work as an animal activist, my art, or a new podcast, you have been there all along. I so appreciate that, more than you could ever know.

 

So I’ve been on Patreon for almost 5 years, and patrons have trickled in and out as my work has evolved, and I’m thrilled to let you know that I’ve revamped my offerings once again. So getting back to how you don’t have to wait to get more entertainment, I actually recorded the first 100 blog posts from my Photo and 100 Words Project, AKA Artsy Reflections, and turned it into an exclusive audiobook that’s available only on Patreon! Not only that but I also added in some behind the scenes commentary, which again, is something you won’t be able to hear anywhere else.

 

For as little as $1 per month you’ll get instant access to all 100 chapters of my Artsy Reflections audio book, and you’ll join my small community of Patrons that get early access to all of my content, including new episodes of Art Ink.

 

There are even more rewards if you’re feeling more generous like a blooper reel of my first few audiobook projects, free copies of all newly released audiobooks I narrate, and, here’s a big one, access to digital copies of all of my fine art photography in my Patron-Only Art Library.

 

There’s actually a whole lot more, but seeing as my intro and conclusion this week are far surpassing the story, I’ll leave the rest for you to discover on your own. Visit rebekahnemethy.com/patreon to get the details on all the fun bonuses you can get your hands on. You’ll find a link in the shownotes.

 

Alright my friends, I’m off to my creative retreat so I can write you some more art-inspired stories. Love ya’ll! Thank you for listening!

Are you an artist with a story to tell?

We'd love to hear your story on the next episode of Art Ink. Check out our submission guidelines to find out how to make it happen.

Become an Insider to Get:

• new Art Ink episodes delivered straight to your inbox

• occasional tips and tricks for artists and storytellers

 

Help me follow my heart

 

For as little as $1 per month you'll get VIP early access to Art Ink episodes & special bonus gifts (like my Artsy Reflections audiobook) that you can't get anywhere else. Plus you'll be helping me make more free stuff - what could be better?

 

 

Did you know Patrons get access to my exclusive art library?

You can download high res, digital versions of every fine art photograph I've toiled over in the past decade, and use it however you like. Yup, really, it's true! There are over 600 images available right now and the gallery will just keep growing.

Art Ink – 9 – Storm of Ages: Nightmare – Sneak Listen of Chapter 1

 

Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Ellie M. Jalbert

Title of Art: The Girl in the Red Dress (painting that doubles as the cover of Nightmare, the first book in the Storm of Ages series)

Artist’s Website: stormofages.com

Instagram: @storm.of.ages

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/StormofAges/

 

Listen to Storm of Ages: Nightmare (Book 1) for free with a 30-day trial on Audible

 

Listen to Storm of Ages: Metamorphosis (Book 2) for free with a 30-day trial on Audible

 

And if you want more when you’re done with those, the third book in the Storm of Ages series is available to read on Amazon.

 

Read Storm of Ages: Origins (Book 3)

 

 

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

Hello my friends! I have a special treat for you in this episode of Art Ink, because today’s featured artist is not only a painter, and an art therapist, but she’s also author of the Storm of Ages series, which I am lucky enough to have had the opportunity to narrate for her. Ellie M. Jalbert is an amazing storyteller, so I’m absolutely thrilled to have her permission to share the first chapter of her book, Nightmare, with you today.

 

What’s interesting about Ellie’s painting is not just the fact that it doubles as Nightmare’s book cover, but that it was created long before the Storm of Ages saga hit bookshelves. She painted it for an art class, and it was her professor who dubbed it The Girl in the Red Dress.

 

Let me try to paint with words what Ellie has created:

 

 

[Art Description:]

 

You can only see the back of The Girl in the Red Dress. Her left arm is wrapped around a white pillar. The elegant dress is tight at the top; it’s held up with three thin straps, fanned out around each of her shoulders, revealing two triangles of pale skin. She sits on the edge of a balcony or window sill, and so the rest of the flowing gown is bunched up at the base of the image. She wears a 5-pointed tiara, and beneath it, golden yellow waves of hair flow down, where the longest strands come to rest at a point in the middle of her lower back.

 

The scene she’s looking at takes up the rest of the space: a wavy, turbulent sea that’s frothing up around the edges of brown patches of earth, some of which hold tilted stone-colored buildings and temples.

 

Ok, with that picture in mind… I hope you enjoy this sneak listen of the Storm of Ages saga…

 

[There’s no transcript for the story this time, but you’re welcome to purchase the kindle or paperback version of the book on Amazon if reading is more your thing =)]

 

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

So, what did you think of that? Do you want to hear more of Ellie’s book? Well, if you do, I have awesome news for you, you can download the first book for free by signing up for a 30-day trial on Audible… which is also free. So what do you have to lose? I’ll have a link in the shownotes for easy access to your free copy.

 

Storm of Ages will eventually be a 7-book series. The first 3 books are out in paperback and for the Kindle, and the first 2 are available to listen to right now.

 

Thank you so much for listening. If you enjoyed this chapter and especially if you go on to hear the full audiobook, make sure you follow Storm of Ages on Facebook or Instagram to be updated on the latest releases and behind the scenes fun.

 

And, of course, a huge shout out goes to Ellie for letting me share this sneak listen with you today. If you haven’t heard the last episode of Art Ink (episode 8) you can listen in on a conversation between Ellie and I discussing the inspiration behind the art AND the books. But, be warned, we do share a few things that might be spoilers… so listen to the books first and come back to that while you’re waiting for us to record book 3… which might be my favorite book so far!

 

Anyway, enough gushing from me, that’s all we have for you today. But check your podcatcher in a couple of weeks for a fresh story in your ears. Until then… ta ta for now!

Are you an artist with a story to tell?

We'd love to hear your story on the next episode of Art Ink. Check out our submission guidelines to find out how to make it happen.

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• new Art Ink episodes delivered straight to your inbox

• occasional tips and tricks for artists and storytellers

 

Help me follow my heart

 

For as little as $1 per month you'll get VIP early access to Art Ink episodes & special bonus gifts (like my Artsy Reflections audiobook) that you can't get anywhere else. Plus you'll be helping me make more free stuff - what could be better?

 

 

Did you know Patrons get access to my exclusive art library?

You can download high res, digital versions of every fine art photograph I've toiled over in the past decade, and use it however you like. Yup, really, it's true! There are over 600 images available right now and the gallery will just keep growing.

Art Ink – 8 – Bonus Conversation with Artist and Author Ellie Jalbert

 

Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Ellie M. Jalbert (She wrote, AND painted the covers for, the Storm of Ages series!)

The first 2 books are available as audiobooks via Audible and narrated by yours truly (and you can get them for free with a 30 day trial on Audible)!

 

Listen to Storm of Ages: Nightmare (Book 1) for free

 

Listen to Storm of Ages: Metamorphosis (Book 2) for free

 

And if you want more when you’re done with those, the third book in the Storm of Ages series is available to read on Amazon.

 

Read Storm of Ages: Origins (Book 3)

 

 

Follow Storm of Ages on social media:

 

Instagram: @storm.of.ages

 

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/StormofAges/

 

 

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

 

Welcome back everyone, I’m your happy pappy host, and I’m so excited to let you all know that I finally have my elevator speech down. Go ahead ask me what I do for a living?

 

::in robotic text to speech:: What do you do?

 

What? I don’t have a co-host and my boyfriend refuses to get behind a mic.

 

Anyway… the next time I have someone trapped in an elevator with me and they ask me what I do for a living I’m going to say: Well I work in a padded room and I talk to myself all day… can you guess what I do for a living?

 

Then they’ll either move to the farthest corner of the elevator assuming I must be schizophrenic, or they’ll be intrigued and ask me for more.

 

Oh, what am I if not schizophrenic? I’m an audiobook narrator.

 

I know, I crack myself up… and I don’t often find myself in elevators talking to strangers so I just felt the need to share here. You’re welcome.

 

But yeah, it probably shouldn’t surprise those of you listening that I’m an audiobook narrator, the truth is reading another writer’s work is so much more fun and less stressful than writing my own books. But I’ve also been a writer my entire life; journaling, blogging, and dabbling in fiction here and there.

 

So far all of the stories you’ve heard have been written, and obviously, performed by me, but today that’s going to change a lil bit.

 

Today’s episode, is not your typical Art Ink episode. And… I’m going to be honest with you… experimentation is definitely in the cards for the future of this show, so get used to it. But, before you go anywhere thinking you got screwed out of a story this week, I want you to know that you’re actually getting 2 episodes today.

 

In just a few minutes I’m going to dive into a conversation with an author friend of mine, and then you’ll get a chance to listen to the first chapter of book 1 in her Storm of Ages series, narrated by yours truly. And I’m telling you this because after editing our conversation I noticed that there may be a few spoilers up ahead – so before you move on, you might want to pause this, listen to the next episode (episode 9) and see if Nightmare pulls you in, and if it does go download the audiobook, listen, and then come back here for some behind the scenes about the inspiration behind the book! The best part is you can get it absolutely free by signing up for a 30-day trial at Audible and as usual, you can find that link in the shownotes.

 

Ok, now that you’ve been warned… or are returning after you took my advice and listened to the book (wasn’t it awesome!?!) I can now lead you into our conversation.

 

It’s been almost exactly a year since I met Ellie Jalbert, and it’s taken me nearly as long to learn how to pronounce her last name (did I get it right Ellie?!). Ellie was one of the first authors I got the chance to work with when I impulsively quit my day job and decided to launch myself into audiobooks full time. She was also the author I’ve bonded with the most. I think if you printed and stacked our emails back and forth to one another we’d have at least a novella, if not a novel.

 

She lovingly signed books for me and mailed them to me along with a pile of Storm of Ages bookmarks. I feel fortunate to say that my job feels more like play than work most days, and with Ellie’s books I felt that even more so, as I got to read the physical copies while I was all snuggled up on my couch.

 

 

So even before I officially launched this podcast, and despite the fact that I didn’t want this show to be interview based, I knew I’d have to have Ellie come on the show, not only because she’s an excellent storyteller, but also because I just had so many questions for her… and how fun would it be, I thought, if I recorded the very first conversation we ever had?!

 

 

[Story: Our conversation is not transcribed… guess you’ll just have to listen =P]

 

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

Ellie and I have a lot in common. Those of you who have been listening from the beginning of this show know that it took me 2 years to bring this podcast to your ears, so I think it’s safe to say that I get in my own way too. So I want to take a moment to thank those of you out there who support us fumbling creative geniuses. If it weren’t for Ellie’s supportive family and friends Storm of Ages might never have been created and what a tragedy that would be! So thank you to Ellie’s Mom, Pop, her brother Tony, Sister in Law Sarah, and at least one of her BFFs Maggie. I’m sure there are many more of you I don’t know by name, but ya’ll are awesome! By supporting Ellie you also ended up supporting me… doesn’t it feel good to know you all are such gracious patrons of the arts?

 

To those of you who haven’t supported us yet, but really want to you can download your free copy of Storm of Ages: Nightmare by clicking the link in the show notes… and even though it’s free for you, Audible still pays us, so you can support us without even having to open your wallet. Again, you can hear the entire first chapter in the very next episode of this podcast right now, so give it a shot… what do you have to lose?

 

Alright, that’s a wrap… thank you for listening!

 

Are you an artist with a story to tell?

We'd love to hear your story on the next episode of Art Ink. Check out our submission guidelines to find out how to make it happen.

Become an Insider to Get:

• new Art Ink episodes delivered straight to your inbox

• occasional tips and tricks for artists and storytellers

 

Help me follow my heart

 

For as little as $1 per month you'll get VIP early access to Art Ink episodes & special bonus gifts (like my Artsy Reflections audiobook) that you can't get anywhere else. Plus you'll be helping me make more free stuff - what could be better?

 

 

Did you know Patrons get access to my exclusive art library?

You can download high res, digital versions of every fine art photograph I've toiled over in the past decade, and use it however you like. Yup, really, it's true! There are over 600 images available right now and the gallery will just keep growing.

Art Ink – 7 – The Sweet Smell of Roses – A Ghost Story Inspired by King Saul’s Art

Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: King Saul AKA Saul Bateman

Title of Art: Smell

Artist’s Website: https://www.king-saul.com/

Instagram: @kingsaulart

 

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

What’s up everyone? Welcome to a brand new episode of Art Ink!

 

So, many of you may not know this about me, but I think I’m far enough away from my high school years to share it without getting too embarrassed. I used to be a gothic chick. There, I said it. There was a brief period in my life when I wore black lipstick, jeans that could fit my entire body in one pant leg, and one of those ridiculously thick ball chain chokers. Back then I was fascinated with all things horror.

 

I’m telling you this because when you go visit our featured artist’s Instagram page, you may wonder why his art is so different from the art I have been featuring. Lately I’ve been drawn to brightly colored abstract art, but there is still a place in my heart for creepy dark art too, and I thought you might like to know where that comes from before I introduce today’s artist.

 

If you’ve ever seen a book called Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, which was one of my favorites growing up, you might remember the epically creepy artwork. And today’s artist has a style reminds me of these illustrations from my childhood, which brings with it memories of slumber parties and readings under blankets by flashlight. I used to love to be scared. And I’ve often wondered why I stopping seeking the thrill of a good scary story.

 

Anyway, this introduction might be a bit anti-climactic… because it’s only as I’ve been writing this that I realized my story doesn’t exactly match the mood of the majority of our featured artist’s work, although a scan through his Instagram page will certainly give you Edgar Allen Poe and Nightmare Before Christmas type vibes, today’s story is not scary at all and I’m doing my very best not to apologize for that… because I have a horrible habit of being sorry for everything AND because inspiration works in mysterious ways and that’s ok.

 

The things that inspire us don’t always show up as perfect reflections in our work. That’s what makes art so awesome, because the trip this drawing took me on, may not be the same one it’d take you on if you didn’t have me here influencing you with my own perspective.

 

Back in my goth chick days I was very afraid of the unknown, and over the years, while my fascination with the so-called supernatural hasn’t died down any, my fear has transformed into awe and wonder. I still ask why, all the time, seriously, I’m kinda like a 5-year-old, but I don’t automatically jump to the worst-case scenario anymore. And, so I guess that’s just my long-ass explanation for why I’m not sorry for writing today’s story. Haha.

 

Well, I’m thrilled to be able to introduce you to King Saul’s art today. On his website he writes that his philosophy is: “to dig deep into the subconscious and build new worlds through art by tearing down the walls between beauty and horror, reality and fantasy, the hearing of pictures and the seeing of sounds. Intrigued?”

 

I don’t know about you but that’s a mission I could get behind, because, yeah, I am intrigued! Aren’t you?

 

Let me try to paint with words what Saul’s created:

 

 

[Art Description:]

 

I’m not 100% sure, but to me this sketch looks like it’s done in pencil and pen. A disembodied nose hovers in the center of the design. On the bottom left a rose rests just below the nose, and there are other flowers scattered all across the bottom of the page. Swirls of scent rise up from all of the flowers, but while most of the scents float midair, the rose is sending its swirls straight into each nostril of the floating nose. On the far left a stick of incense releases a swirl of smoke that intermingles with the steam rising from a hot beverage just behind it.

 

Saul calls this piece “Smell,” and it’s this sketch that inspired the following ghost story I’ve titled, “The Sweet Scent of Roses.”

 

 

[Story:]

 

Mark sat straight up in bed. The scent of roses was so strong, it was like a bouquet of flowers was in his face. He inhaled deeply, exhaled, inhaled again.

 

The last time Mark had smelled a real rose was at Jasmin’s funeral. Though, before that, he couldn’t step into their home without being overwhelmed by the sweet smell.

 

A few more deep breaths confirmed that the scent hadn’t faded away. Over the past few years this had happened before, but it had always faded away quickly, leaving Mark to believe that the sweet sensation had been a trick of his imagination, a memory so strong his mind created it as a sort of comfort food for his soul.

 

He wasn’t imagining it this time, though. There were roses infusing his every breath.

 

Mark glanced around the room. “Jasmine?” he whispered. He didn’t think it was possible, but the scent suddenly seemed stronger. “Jasmine,” he sighed, “I knew it was you.”

 

Something urged him to get out of bed. He imagined Jasmine giggling in a cloud above him, a mischievous smile that thinned her big blue eyes just enough for it to be seductive, the way a thong somehow sexifies a butt cheek. Mark knew she’d laugh at that analogy if she were still here. In fact, she’d probably make it up herself. He couldn’t see her at all, of course, but it was as if she were luring him through the darkness with a rose in her teeth, always just out of reach. That was his own imagination though. If she was here it was probably more like Lakitu (lah-KEE-too), that pesky cloud guy in Super Mario Bros., but instead of flinging Spinies down to the Earth below, she had a bouquet of roses on a fishing line.

 

He followed the smell all the way into the hallway and it suddenly disappeared. Mark nodded his head back and forth sniffing the air, but it was gone. He turned back toward the bedroom and suddenly he was smacked in the face with sweetness. He followed his nose to the closet and walked up to his own naked body reflected in the mirrored sliding doors. Did Jasmine want him to get dressed?

 

The smell wafted in and out as Mark pulled on jeans and a hoodie, but never fully disappeared. He imagined Jasmine bouncing excitedly, like the moments before they got on a new rollercoaster, a fun cocktail of fear and excitement bubbling out of her heels, lifting her up and down.

 

As soon as his socks were on the scent led him to the front door. Then it suddenly dissipated. Mark opened the door, sniffed the air; nothing. It wasn’t until he turned around that the faint scent of roses once again seeped into his septum.

 

Mark was beginning to wonder if maybe the spirit leading him around might be a fairy, or some other type of tiny, flighty being, judging from the way it kept spinning him around the house.

 

He walked back through the hall toward the kitchen. Jasmine seemed to pause for a moment midway, and so did he until his eyes fell upon the unicorn horn kaleidoscope she’d impulsively bought in Sedona on their honeymoon. It was way too much money and he hated it, but he’d never even considered getting rid of it after she was gone.

 

Mark wasn’t sure if the pause was a happy, proud pause or a sad, sentimental one. Perhaps it was all of those feels. At least those were the emotions he felt.

 

Wandering wherever his invisible incense wanted to lead him, Mark found himself in front of the refrigerator when all of the floral tones suddenly vanished from his senses.

 

“Really, Jazz?” Mark asked. “I’m not hungry.”

 

The roses didn’t come back, however, until he’d opened the fridge door.

 

“How about we compromise?” he said, “I’ll have a glass of orange juice… I really haven’t been that bad, have I Jazz – that you think you need to come back and nanny me.”

 

The scent bounced in the air, like back in the closet. Jasmine was giggling, at least that was his interpretation of the strange way the smell tickled his nostrils. He didn’t know how to read it, though, without being able to see the expression on her face. Jasmine laughed at everything in life. Laughter was her energy, her defense mechanism, her medicine.

 

As soon as Mark put his empty glass down the roses vanished until his nose was pointed toward the front door. Midway back through the hall, a breath of hot, moist air brushed up the skin of his neck, “don’t forget your keys,” Jasmine whispered-or did she?, and the scent suddenly strengthened. He stopped abruptly, grabbed the keys, and headed to the garage.

 

As he drove the mile that led out of their private drive the roses remained as an undertone. When he got to the stop sign Mark asked, “Which way?”

 

He flicked the turn signal up and the green arrow blinked towards the right. Jasmine pulled her roses back out of his world. When he pushed the lever to signal left the floral smell invaded his nostrils times ten.

 

“To the left it is then,” Mark said.

 

Several turns and miles later, Mark found himself turning into the Whole Foods parking lot. He’d never shopped here himself, but Jasmine used to come here weekly.

 

“Are you trying to make me eat healthy, Jazz?” he whispered softly, “because we both know that’s about as unlikely as a rabbit pulling a magician out of her hat.”

 

That bouncy tickle hit his nose again and Mark mentally checked himself. Either she thought he was hilarious, which was doubtful, as she’d heard that one at minimum a dozen times, or she was excited about what was coming next. And despite Jasmine’s constant stream of healthy meals, she’d never been that excited about food. That she tolerated cooking would be a nice way to put it, it was an obligation. No, whatever Jazz was excited about, it must be something else.

 

The sweet scent of roses led Mark into the store. “Do I need a cart, Jazz?” He whispered, hoping no one noticed him seemingly talk to himself. All sweetness dissipated immediately.

 

“I’ll take that as a no,” he said spinning in a 180 from the corner of parked carts to face the produce section. He walked slowly along the chilled wall of leafy greens as the smell seeped back into his senses. He passed the spinach, a bit surprised that Jasmine hadn’t stopped him… she used to sneak a handful or two into his smoothie every morning, he remembered the look on her face when he caught her a year into it… surprise, but then smug satisfaction as she informed him he’d been drinking spinach for at least a year already and if he tasted it now it was all in his head.

 

Mark was so caught in the memory that he didn’t see the puddle he was approaching. As if a “too little too late” warning as his feet slid out from under him, the tiny sprinklers above the fresh herbs and broccoli misted the left side of his body as he went down. Just before his head ricocheted off of the low shelf and onto the hard floor, the strongest smell yet smacked him in the face. Jasmine was giggling again… she always did find it funny when his clumsiness got the best of him, often apologizing and uncontrollably cackling at the same time. Why would any of that change after death? That’s the last thing Mark thought of before everything went black.

 

***

 

“Are you ok?” a concerned voice asked.

 

The voice brought Mark back to reality, back to the grocery store, but it did nothing to tame the ghostly remnants of his late wife.

 

In fact the sweet smell was so strong now, it was starting to sicken him. He couldn’t escape it. It was as if he were dropped into a densely packed pool of potpourri, unable to swim to the surface, petals stuffed into his mouth and nostrils.

 

Mark’s head was throbbing, the pulse pinching the back of his left eye. He slowly parted his lids, letting the light in cautiously, luckily the silhouette above him blocked most of the light. Long, dark, curly hair made a sort of cave around the woman’s face.

 

She spoke again, “Can you hear me?”

 

“Yeah… I’m ok,” Mark managed after a minute.

 

The woman grabbed onto his forearm and pulled him to sitting. The mist still spritzed the air and clung to her curls like glittery morning dew. Behind her an abandoned cart stood askew, empty except for a single bouquet of red roses. Another bouquet lay abandoned on the floor somewhere between where she knelt and the path back to her cart.

“I keep telling them about this puddle,” the woman said, “I almost went down myself last week. Do you think you can stand?”

 

“I think so.” Mark said and then tried. The woman helped steady him as she got to her own feet. As she rose her face was revealed from the shadows. Worried turquoise eyes darted around his face.

 

“I’m fine,” he assured her, though, truth be told, Jasmine’s floral infusion was still at full power and his queasiness was on the rise.

 

Mark’s lie did nothing to calm the stranger’s features, though, so he headed towards the scattered flowers on the floor to prove himself.

 

“Thanks,” she smiled as she accepted the now disheveled bouquet, shifted the unruly flowers to one arm, hugging them to her chest, and extended her free hand. “I’m June,” she said.

 

“Mark,” he replied taking her hand, and he couldn’t believe it, but the scent actually got stronger, and he involuntarily gagged.

 

“Are you sure you’re all right?” June asked, her features back on high alert, “you don’t look so good… are you nauseated?”

 

“Yeah, just a little, but it’s the smell of those flowers doing it, not my fall.” Mark said weakly.

 

“Really?” June said. She glanced at the flowers in her arms and then back at him. She didn’t look convinced. “I don’t know, nausea is a common side effect of a concussion,” she said as she turned to place the flowers back in her cart, “you should really get yourself checked out.”

 

“I’ll be fine,” Mark managed a smile as he said it. Jasmine had let up on the perfume since he’d voiced his problem aloud and his stomach was settling.

 

“Ok, Mark,” June said, “but if you change your mind, I’d be happy to give you a ride to the emergency room.”

 

“Nah, I’m good.”

 

“Ok… well, good luck,” she said somewhat awkwardly and pushed her cart down the aisle.

 

As June got farther and farther away, so did Jazz’s scent. Had he been imagining this smell the whole time? Was it just June’s flowers he’d been smelling since he’d entered the store?

 

Unsure what to do next without his floral guide, he headed back outside and sat on a bench.

 

“Jazz?” He whispered.

 

Nothing.

 

“Jasmine, are you there?” He tried again.

 

Still nothing.

 

“What was that all about?” He muttered to himself this time. “Am I going crazy?”

 

Mark sat there for a while, reimagining the day he’d had so far. To his left, the automatic doors slid opened and closed, popping out people like a factory line of grocery Barbie dolls. A seemingly endless stream of blondes in yoga attire walked past him.

 

He attempted one more time to prove his own sanity. “How do you drown a Whole Foods Barbie?” he paused. “Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of her kombucha cup!”

 

That did it, and he could faintly sense the roses bouncing in his nose again.

 

Through the glass doors he spotted June checking out, she was like black beauty in a herd of palominos. The invisible incense ramped up again, and suddenly, he finally got what Jasmine was trying to say.

 

“Jazz…” he whispered, looking down at the ground. “I don’t know if I’m ready yet. I still miss you so much.”

 

She was still there, but she was pulling back, as if to say, “don’t be ridiculous, Mark.” It was easy enough to imagine… she’d said it plenty of times before.

 

He looked up and to the left and saw that June was heading toward the double doors. “I love you Jazz,” he said. “Thank you.”

 

Mark rose just as the doors parted and when June locked eyes with him, a broad smile spread across her face.

 

“You change your mind, killer?”

 

“Well the thing is, I kind of hate doctors,” Mark confessed, “but maybe you can keep me company? Ya know, just in case I take a turn for the worse?”

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

A big shout out goes to King Saul for being so kind as to share his art with all of us today, I’m so grateful for your generosity, Saul! If you’re interested in the cover art used for this episode you should know that a slightly altered version of “Smell” is actually available as a linoleum print. This is 1 of the 5 pieces that are a part of Saul’s Synesthesia Series.

 

In case you don’t know what synesthesia is, it’s described as a “condition” in the dictionary, but I’m going to call it an ability… I might even go so far as to say it’s a superpower, and it’s when someone’s senses connect in ways that allow them to perceive things most people can’t. For example, someone with synesthesia may be able to hear colors, see sounds, or taste words. It’s truly fascinating to me… I remember reading awhile back that some people with synesthesia are able to see a wider spectrum of colors, but that’s when I got a little jealous and stopped reading.

 

So, now on top of wanting to write a scarier story to pair with Saul’s work, I’m also wishing my main character had synesthesia. Ugh… well there’s always another story to tell. You know that cliché about how a picture is worth 1000 words… well honestly I think that’s a vast understatement… maybe 1000 stories is more like it. And that reminds me, I’ve been putting together a long list of writing prompts for any of you artists out there who struggle with writing about your art. I have no idea when it’ll be done, but I do know that it’ll be super helpful when it is, so I’ll be sure to let you know as soon as it’s available.

 

So, anyway, please do make sure to check out Saul’s work on Instagram @kingsaulart or you can visit his website at king-saul.com.

 

Alrighty, my friends, that’s a wrap! Thank you so much for listening! Don’t forget to check back here in two weeks for the next episode… or better yet subscribe to the show so you don’t have to worry about missing out. I’ll catch ya next time!

Are you an artist with a story to tell?

We'd love to hear your story on the next episode of Art Ink. Check out our submission guidelines to find out how to make it happen.

Become an Insider to Get:

• new Art Ink episodes delivered straight to your inbox

• occasional tips and tricks for artists and storytellers

 

Help me follow my heart

 

For as little as $1 per month you'll get VIP early access to Art Ink episodes & special bonus gifts (like my Artsy Reflections audiobook) that you can't get anywhere else. Plus you'll be helping me make more free stuff - what could be better?

 

 

Did you know Patrons get access to my exclusive art library?

You can download high res, digital versions of every fine art photograph I've toiled over in the past decade, and use it however you like. Yup, really, it's true! There are over 600 images available right now and the gallery will just keep growing.

Art Ink – 6 – Beautifully Broken – A Short Story Inspired by Alisa Burke’s Art

Links from the Show at a Glance:

 

Artist: Alisa Burke

Title of Art: untitled IG post

Artist’s Website: https://www.shopalisaburke.com/

Artist’s Blog: www.alisaburke.com

Instagram: @alisakburke

 

Art Ink Submission Guidelines: rebekahnemethy.com/artinksubs

 

 

Art Ink Podcast Transcript:

 

[Intro:]

 

Hello, my friends! Welcome back to another episode of Art Ink, I’m so grateful that you’ve decided to share your ears with me today.

 

The story you’re about to hear was sparked by another great artist I discovered on Instagram. What I really love about her art is that she works in so many mediums, and what I really love about her is that she’s so open to sharing her process with her fans. If you scroll through this artist’s Insta page you’ll find art journaling, watercolor, black and white doodling, hand-painted pottery, mandalas, photography, and even enormous murals that cover an entire wall. I haven’t even mentioned the many hand-embellished items you might scroll past… seriously I’ve seen everything from shoes to refrigerators on this artist’s feed.

 

Alisa Burke is the kind of artist I want to be when I grow up, because she just doesn’t limit herself creatively… yet her work is still so unmistakable that you know whose work you’re seeing at first glance.

 

With so much gorgeous art to choose from I found myself having decision regret while working on this episode… it’s not that I didn’t still love the piece I picked, but there’s just infinite beauty and inspiration in a lot of her work and every time I see a new piece it’s my new favorite.

 

But the reason I was inspired to write today’s story didn’t just come from looking at Alisa’s art, the caption is what solidified the direction I’d be going in. But before I share the caption with you, it’ll just make more sense after I describe today’s featured art.

 

[Art Description:]

 

With a quick glance you’ll see a yellow and red flower, but upon further inspection you’ll see that this flower has been pulled apart and then put together again, in fact, this one flower is a mosaic, you could even call it a flower mandala, that’s made of at least 3 different flowers.

 

In it’s very center is a yellow mum (at least I think these are mums), and it looks like about half of its petals have been evenly removed from the outside. There is a faint orangey tint to the outer rim of this yellow centerpiece. Surrounding this yellow middle are 3 rings of plucked petals, all carefully placed so that they appear to be spreading outwards. The first ring around the center is made of red petals, the petals surrounding those are white at their inner points and transition to pale pink on the wider outer parts. The last, and largest ring is made up of yellow petals that transition to red, and this outermost ring is just a tad messier than the rest.

 

The remnants of the flowers used, and some loose petals are scattered to the left and bottom of the image. In the bottom left corner a half-opened pair of scissors lies among them.

 

And the caption Alisa used along with the photo? She wrote, “One of the most important things I’ve learned is that things can beautiful even when they fall apart. #beautyinbrokenness”

 

I call this piece of fiction, Beautifully Broken. Enjoy.

 

[Story:]

 

She looked into the mirror, ran her tongue over the bloated crack, tasted the coppery blood, felt the familiar sting as the dried salt from her tears mingled with salvia and slid over the wound. How many times had she licked at her wounds like this? She’d lost track. Countless times.

 

She ran her fingers under the eye she couldn’t open; the left eye. He was right handed, so this was normal. She winced, not at the pain so much as the thought: when did this become normal?

 

“How was your day?” He’d said when he walked in the front door an hour earlier. He didn’t have his uniform on, so obviously he wasn’t coming from work, but she knew better than to question it.

 

“Good.” She gave him a practiced smile, so practiced that she almost convinced herself of her happiness.

 

“How were your mentees today?” he asked.

 

“Oh, you know, the same as usual,” she said and he smiled slowly… too slowly.

 

Suddenly she was on the ground nursing her rapidly swelling eye and shielding the rest of her face. Through the cracks of her arms and fingers she could see that his fists were still clenched.

 

The first strike was almost always the most powerful punch. He wasn’t a big man, but he made up for it in strategy. Maybe it was a good thing he wasn’t in uniform, she remembered thinking, that he didn’t have a belt full of weapons to use on her.

 

“You wanna tell me where the fuck you were today?” he said, “because I know you weren’t at the center!”

 

The replay in her mind’s eye faded and she was in front of the mirror again, looking at the result of that moment. The pink skin around her eye was already reddening, and she knew exactly the spectrum of colors her eye would transition through before she could show her face with confidence again.

 

After most of these attacks she’d try to avoid the mirror as best as she could, but the peripheral shadow was like a magnet pulling her pupils, and the inevitable glance would always shock her-sending self-pitying sorrow flying up through her throat, manifesting in gut-wrenching sobs.

 

This time was different, though. This time she saw not sadness but strength in her face. She took in a deep breath, and as she exhaled, extended a steady hand in front of her, traced the broken line of her bottom lip in the reflection. Her mind’s eye healed her face: the swollen lip shrinking, the crack shriveling up into a squiggly scab until it disappeared, the bruising under her eye spreading then contracting as it morphed from red to purple to blue, at the peak of its darkness, and then fading into a pale green transitioning to yellow and finally a dirt smudge of brown before it completely disappeared. There was beauty in the power her body had to revitalize itself again and again and again.

 

This time was different, she assured herself. This time she was leaving.

 

Her gaze drifted from the reflected lip, down her finger, and to the sliver of glass in the side of her hand. She replayed the last blow of the night; so faded despite the fact it’d happened minutes ago… he’d backhanded her across the face as she’d been gasping to recover her breath.

 

“I asked you a question, cunt!” He screamed just before that, and the name gave her power. She’d recently learned what that word actually meant, all encompassing feminine power.

 

She pushed herself up to sitting, leaned back against the wall and said, calmly, and with her own version of a sinister smile, “you asked if I wanted to tell you, and no, actually, I don’t really feel like telling you.”

 

This he wasn’t expecting. Her unbridled answer seeped into one ear and steamed out the other, scrambling his brain in the process and narrowing his eyes.

 

Almost as fast as his first blow, his hand was clenched around her throat. He tightened his grip and slid her up the wall. “Where the fuck were you?” he demanded, pulling her towards him and lifting her from the floor so that she had to stretch to keep her tiptoes grounded.

 

She struggled for air, clawed at his wrist, and he let her down and loosened his grip just long enough for her to choke out, “None of your fucking business.”

 

With that he swung her around the entryway to the opposite wall and thrust her backwards. Her head crashed into a mirror and she heard multiple cracks travel past her ears. He pulled her forwards and slammed her back again, and again, and again… and again? Was it four times… or was it five… six? She couldn’t remember. What she did remember was the way her brain shook inside her head, her vision foggy and vignetted with black, and the unending shower of glass; with every blow it was like another windswept wave of sparkling rain ran down the walls in slow motion, so slow it was like soft static as it hit the floor.

 

At the memory, she ran her uninjured hand through her hair and a faint crystal rain chimed against the floor far below. Even the gentle movement of her hair deepened the throb in her skull. She was too afraid of what she’d find to feel her scalp, though.

 

Looking back down at her hand it was more of a shard than a sliver, and she pulled it out with her nails. Blood appeared in its place; dripped down her forearm where more of the broken mirror clung. She brushed most of it off and another rush of glass rain tinkled against porcelain. A few pieces remained, though, and with tweezers she picked them out. One by one the silver slivers pinged into the sink… like the drizzle after a downpour.

 

“I came to surprise you.” He’d said after he finally let go of her throat. “I was going to take you out to dinner. It’s our fucking anniversary you know.”

 

No, she hadn’t known; hadn’t remembered; hadn’t cared to remember. Though she couldn’t get a grip on the number of years, it may as well have been forever; fresh out of the foster system at 18 years old, marrying him seemed the brighter alternative to the street life she’d seen many of her peers succumb to.

 

Clutching her throat and gasping for air, she couldn’t respond right away, but eventually she rasped out, “why the fuck would I want to celebrate how many years I’ve lived in this hell?”

 

His eyes narrowed quicker this time, but the wrinkles in his forehead still registered a split second of shock. And that’s when he’d backhanded her, splitting her lip and knocking her down into the puddle of glass at their feet, where she’d instinctively broken her fall with her forearm.

 

He’d stormed away after that, and only once a few minutes of silence had passed did she finally raise herself out of the jagged pool of mirror pieces. She looked down at herself in the scattered, broken glass. Her eyes were pulled to the bright bloody gash on her lips. A tear ran past the corner of her mouth in one jagged piece, and jumped to another shard that caught it sliding over the edge of her chin. She’d felt as broken and shattered as she looked spread out across the floor.

 

The pink-tinged slivers coating the bottom of the sink replaced the broken glass from her memory. After she extracted the rest of the mirror from her arm, she looked up at herself, suddenly whole again.

 

With a double layer of tissues she carefully wiped up the glass. The action was automatic, cleaning up these messes had also become normal, and her mind rebelled against her body. She imagined throwing the handful up into the air like jagged confetti, and watching it scatter across the bathroom floor. She also imagined him drowsily stepping down into the trap she’d laid out with bare feet, and that look of surprise she was coming to relish lately.

 

Her open palm hesitated over the trashcan, but then, suddenly struck with an idea, she bundled her collection up inside the tissues and pushed it into her pocket.

 

She tiptoed up to the bedroom doorway’s edge. He was snoring like a lawnmower. This was also normal; he never lost sleep over one of their altercations, no matter how bad he hurt her. In fact, it wouldn’t be far-fetched to say he slept better. Apparently, it took a lot out of the poor, little guy to beat the shit out of his wife.

 

In the kitchen, she slowly opened the cabinet door beneath the sink, felt around behind the cleaning supplies, and pulled out a small backpack. From inside the front pocket she pulled out a burner phone she’d bought months ago and navigated to the texting icon.

 

“It’s time.” She typed and then sent it to the only contact listed. She’d hoped that she’d have a few more months to save up more money, but now that he’d found out she was no longer volunteering at the youth center he’d never stop until he knew what she was up to. Those luxuriously long days daydreaming at the library were over. But now it was time to make those daydreams come true.

 

She felt bad knowing that she’d be standing up all of her tutoring students, and she’d managed to snag quite a few regulars in the short time she’d been teaching English, but it was now or never, and the less people who knew where she was headed the better.

 

She checked inside the bag for what seemed like the millionth time: passport, birth certificate, social security card, and cash cushioned between a couple of changes of clothes. The documents were actually replacements she’d managed to acquire since planning her escape… she figured it’d buy her more time if he thought she’d have to come back for something essential.

 

She returned the phone to the pack’s front pocket where she’d stashed one other essential item, professional grade make up, the kind of foundation Hollywood uses to cover up tattoos. She was hoping she wouldn’t need it, but was glad she’d thought of the worst-case scenario.

 

The last thing she did before walking out the door was to sweep up the remaining pieces of glass in the hallway. She dumped the dustpan into a plastic bag, added the tissue bundle from her pocket, sealed the top, and stowed it in her backpack.

 

Twenty minutes later she was racing down the highway toward freedom.

 

“Slow down Penny,” she said, “if we get pulled over, I’ll never get out of here.”

 

Penny took her foot off the gas until the car coasted down to the speed limit. “I’m sorry,” she said, “I’m just so nervous.”

 

Then after a pause, “Are you sure you want to do this? I mean, there are plenty of other places you can go inside the US and be safe. Safer,” she stressed, “most likely.”

 

“We’ve been through this,” she said as she laid a thick coat of foundation over the darkening skin around her eye, “I’ve done my research, it’s perfectly safe in Guatemala.”

 

“If you say so.”

 

“And I do.”

 

They were silent for the next couple of hours. It wasn’t a comfortable silence, but nor was it uncomfortable. Bittersweet was probably the best word for it. They were both happy she’d be free of her demon husband, but equally devastated about what her departure meant for their own friendship.

 

When they pulled up to the Philadelphia Greyhound station, Penny rummaged through her purse and pulled out an envelope. “Your bus doesn’t leave until 9, though, do you want me to wait with you until then?”

 

“No, you need to get back to NY so that if he seeks you out you’ll be there.”

 

“Right.”

 

“Did you-“

 

“I used the pre-paid Mastercard for both tickets, don’t worry.”

 

“Thanks, Penny.” She leaned over the center console and stretched her arms out for a hug.

 

Penny gripped her hard, “You take care of yourself, okay?” she whispered to cover up the sob trying to fight its way out. “And you call me when you get there, so I know you’re safe.”

 

“You need to get rid of that phone, we talked about this.”

 

“And I will, as soon as I know you made it there ok.” Her stiff look said she wouldn’t be wavering on this stipulation.

 

“Fine, I’ll call you… once.”

 

“That’s all I’m askin’.” And for the first time that night, Penny smiled.

 

 

It had taken her 6 months to plan her escape, but the 2 days it took her to reach her final destination were the longest 48 hours of her life. She doubted she’d be so unlucky as to come across another cop from her husband’s precinct, or anyone else who might know her, on a bus to the middle of nowhere in Kansas City, Missouri, but she kept her head low and her guard up nevertheless.

 

The one time she’d actually gotten the courage to call for help it’d been futile. One officer had walked right past her and shook her husband’s hand, and the other, while sympathetic, informed her in no uncertain terms that her husband was a powerful man and she’d best not anger him again. She had no idea how far his reach stretched, so she couldn’t be too careful.

 

By the time she’d gotten to the Kansas City International Airport, she could taste her freedom, but the nausea didn’t turn into butterflies until she was stuttering through broken Spanish at the information booth in Guatemala City.

 

Aside from the flight and bus tickets, a few pages of loose leaf were also tucked away in the envelope that Penny had given her. She herself had written some key phrases, addresses, and phone numbers down and had her friend hold onto them for safe keeping, that way if her husband had found her getaway bag, he’d still be in the dark about where she planned to run away to. Fortunately, it hadn’t come to that.

 

She bought a new burner phone at the airport and called Penny as soon as she landed.

 

“You were right, girl, he did come looking for you.”

 

“And what did you tell him?”

 

“I told him I had no idea where you were, but that I hoped you met a new man and ran off into the sunset… the look on his face was priceless!”

 

“Penny,” she chastised, but a smirk crept over her features and seeped into her voice, “you shouldn’t have done that.” She imagined it was that stupidly surprised look she’d drawn out of him, not once but twice, the last night she’d seen him.

 

After another heartbreaking goodbye, she tossed the phone in the trash and headed into the mob of drivers at the airport’s entrance.

 

 

Six months later…

 

She closed her book and sighed. It was the most satisfied kind of sigh: like the exhale you’d hear from someone taking their first breath of fresh air after years of living underground. It was a sigh that said freedom, a sigh that sang gratitude, a sigh she was happily hearing on the daily these days.

 

She knew from the shape of the triangular patch of sunlight creeping across the orange tiled floor that it was around 3pm. Being so close to the equator meant that the sun rose at 6am and the sun set at 6pm, give or take a few minutes. If it weren’t for the dozen or so students on her schedule, she might’ve opted to live without clocks. To check herself, she glanced at the digital numbers on her nightstand, yup, it read 3:02. She could totally live without clocks.

 

She looked around her modest room. Furnished with only a bed, nightstand, desk, and chair, it was definitely not a place she imagined she’d come to love so much. All of the furniture was so simple and plain that it was obviously handmade. Actually, “simple and plain” were euphemisms for what her first impression of the decor had been when she’d arrived, “fugly” was the word that ran through her mind, and her opinion hadn’t really changed on that front.

 

The walls were white stucco, and on her first night there, the only thing that had decorated them was one monster-sized cockroach that kept her awake half the night in fear. She’d planned on finding her own place as soon as she could, but the family that ran the bed and breakfast style inn had grown on her and, more importantly, she felt safe there.

 

Her room was on the top floor of the three-story house, and that meant she had the rooftop patio pretty much to herself. Weddings at the nearby church meant frequent fireworks, and she always had a private front row seat.

 

Surprisingly enough it was cheaper to stay there then to rent her own place, and they fed her! But despite her extended stay, these living arrangements were still only temporary, which was why she hadn’t done much to decorate. Leaned up against the wall on the little desk, though, was her one decorative contribution: a 12-inch white ceramic plate turned mosaic. The letters, haphazardly stitched together in shattered glass, read “Beautifully Broken.”

 

Some of the slivers and shards were still tinged with pink, she noticed as she leaned back in her chair, and that was ok… she still had a lot of healing to do, but it comforted her to know how far she’d come.

 

 

[Conclusion:]

 

Thank you so much for tuning in and listening to today’s story. And a sincere shout out to Alisa for allowing us to share her work with you today. Don’t forget that you can see the art that sparked this story right in your podcast app, if your app of choice shows episode specific artwork. If you’re not seeing it, take a look at the full description of the show to see it there, and if all else fails you can always visit rebekahnemethy.com/artink6 to see it on my website.

 

One thing I forgot to mention about Alisa at the top of the show is that she has over 90 online art courses available on her website shopalisaburke.com oh, and Alisa is spelled A-l-i-s-a Burke with an E at the end. It’s all written out for you in the show notes. But you should definitely take a look at her awe-inspiring Instagram feed @alisakburke first to get an overall look at all the wonderful things she could teach you. Warning… you may not be able to stop scrolling. Just sayin’!

 

Anyway, that’s all for today. I’ll be back with a new art-inspired story in a couple of weeks. But until then, as my friend Melissa Dinwiddie likes to say, don’t beat yourself up, love yourself up.

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